my madeleines

Confession: New Year's Eve

2012-01-01T11:56:00.000-07:00

Myth: Everyone on Planet Earth is out on the town having a fabulous time, meeting the love of their life, and looking gorgeous amongst hoards of gorgeous friends. You are the only human being not involved. This makes you supremely lame.

-----

Told friends I'm a no go. Check. After massage, pick up quick dinner.

Why is this parking lot such madness? Isn't everyone supposed to be out on the town having a fabulous time, meeting the love of their life, and looking gorgeous amongst hoards of gorgeous friends? What's with the stampede at the market?

Pizza. Check. Oh, that's right, I need orange juice. Better get a cart.

And string cheese. Need milk, as pretty sure mine has curdled up a bit. You know what sounds good? Pasta.

Whole wheat or "enriched" noodles? Um. Um? Um! Both. Two of each.

Need cute containers to hold pasta on countertop. Too pretty and imported and colorful to be stored in cupboard. Yes, good idea. Cute containers.

"Excuse me, where's the mayo or Miracle Whip or something like that?" I'll totally make that parmesan chicken thing I saw on the hulu commercial. I bet the recipe is even on the Hellman's label. Or Google will know. 2012 is my year for cookin' at home. I'll totally nail it. Perfect Soccer Mom did it in like 15 seconds and it was golden loveliness. I got this.

Oh. Chicken. Right. Now, where would that be? "Excuse me..."

Pasta looks adorable on countertop. Goes well with vintage milk bottle vignette and nested jewel-toned mixing bowls. Will impress friends by perceived ability to cook stuff. And mad staging skills. Suck it, Pottery Barn.

Countertop not sparkling though. Clorox wipe will quickly take care of...

Text from Portland friend (actually, instant message within the Words With Friends app, which is actually a critical distinction in our case): "What are you doing tonight? I'm toying with staying in." Validation.

How old is that stuff in the cupboard, I wonder? Does Jello expire? "Use by 08/2008." Huh. Have I ever made Jello? Why is this here? Isn't it horse parts or something? Toss. Liberating.

I think that's correct. Google: "Do I need to refrigerate pasta sauce?" WikiAnswers will know. I got this. 2012 is my culinary cotillion. "...however, once opened..." Oh, okay.

Wait. Is that Ramen? A can of pineapple from...what year what year where is it? It's still okay. It's not even opened. Oh wait. It has my name written with Sharpie ink on the top. From when I had roommates sharing my cupboards. Seven years ago.

Text received: "I am relaxing/cleaning house. Have some halibut to cook. Wine. Movie at home with the furry kids." I told you, World. Fabulous people all over the map are sitting on their sofa right now. I told you.

OMG. Gross. Been seven years since I had either roommates or any remote necessity to property tag my fruit cans. How many apartments and boxes and moving vans has this little fruit can seen? I should call the Smithsonian. Which one? American History? Could call Natural History. They're probably fossilized in there. I'm a long-time member. I bet I can get a curator on the phone. Why have I never consumed this pineapple? How hard would that have been? Why have I packed it around...oh, forget it. Toss.

In fact, while I'm in here...

I like that I've spent over an hour deep purging and organizing my cupboards, freezer, fridge, secret snackety snack sugar stash, et.al. New year, new kitchen, new me.

Bag of unopened pasta from 2009? It's good, remember, it's not even opened. That makes it okay. But, I have Pretty New 2012 Pasta in Cute Containers. This time around, my pasta cooking resolution will stick. For real. Not like the disastrous Pasta Cooking Resolution of 2009. Clearly not like that. Oh fine, toss.

I was raised by hippies, not Depression Era beet farmers. What's with the nonperishable food hoarding? OMG I've become the stuff of cable tv. Toss. Toss. Toss. Tosstosstoss.

Just go outside, you're not leaving this sitting in your entryway. Frozen stuff will melt, leak everywhere. Don't want to know what no-longer-frozen fish from 2010 smells like in your carpet. Just go.

It's freezing out here. My neighbors will be all, "Who's that mysterious girl taking out three overstuffed trash bags at 9:00pm on New Year's Eve? She must be having an awesome party to generate that much waste. We've barely filled one trash bag. We're lame. She can also throw a party that fierce with no makeup in yoga pants and flip flops? She IS the fiercest. Or a lesbian. I kinda thought so."

Clankety clank clank go three Hefty bags full of evidence of Old Me Who Apparently Hoarded Food. Definitely sounded like wine bottles. Hope they heard that. People will think my party is fierce.

WOW...wow...wow...echo. My fridge is huge. And dirty.

So satisfying. I will wake up sans hangover, STD-free, with a refrigerator sparkling like...

What IS that? Ew. Bleach. Bleach. Fix it. Hurry.

Text received: "...listening to wait wait don't tell me on opb, with my christmas lights on, looking out the window. Cue sappy music. I'm sure I'll meet the love of my life from inside my house."

Requires myth-busting response typed one handed to avoid Palmolive soaked iPhone: "87% sure the men of our dreams are not at a bar tonight. Cruel irony is they're doing exactly what we are, just in their own homes." (If you would like to prove me right, and you're a tall singer/songwriter with a well-paid day job, hit up the comment section.)

That's a really strong smell. Bleach in the fridge. Was that a good idea? Google, help me. The food's fine, right? I have a box of baking powder in there somewhere. It smells like a YMCA locker room.

I never did make dinner.

Nope, not even DIY Boboli. That's frozen CPK, bitches. Deal with it.

Note to Self: Pasta tomorrow. Definitely make use of Pretty New 2012 Pasta in Cute Containers. Tomorrow.

...only it's purer

2011-12-25T19:08:00.008-07:00

[originally posted 07/31/2011 to now-defunct iWeb blog]

Recap: “Beyond all my book learnin’ and such, the take-away from this meta-analysis of grad school is one of a refiner’s fire. Grad school sucked everything out of my life except for grad school. I was able to boil down over the past two years the bits I’d really like to take back. [...] What grad school did was refine my list of what really really matters. When I finally got a break, what did I want to do? When I decided to blow off my research on Saturday afternoon, who did I want to spend time with? When I’m done and it’s all behind me now, what made it to the top of the list of things that matter most to me?”

Refining consists of purifying an impure material, in most cases metal. The final material is usually identical chemically to the original one...only it is purer.

Thanks, Wikipedia. Again, impressive research skills brought to you by grad school. My thesis has nothing on this blog post. I can google an answer before you even realize what you’re asking. I’ll relish that fact as I write student loan checks for the next 35 years, I’m sure of it.

Back to the refining idea: In a way, it’s an exciting feeling. It’s almost like I had a huge moving sale and thousands of people drove away with all my clutter. As I walk back into an empty house and look around, I realize that I have ultimate freedom. I have ultimate freedom as to what I put, and don’t put, back into the space. So what makes it in?

My core friends. A large extended social network is a given (and I look forward to reconnecting with all sorts of people I’ve lost touch with), but I’ve come to deeply love core people that I realize I can’t live without. I plan to love them like crazy from here on out.
Spiritual space and room to breathe. This aspect of my life has ebbed and flowed freely over the years, but I’m at my best when I cultivate a connection to something beyond myself. Most would assume that translates into a religious context, but no, it’s so much more than that. Introspection, nature, social justice work, regular yoga practice, creative outlets, like-minded radicals, volunteering...it’s all spiritual to me because it all feeds my spirit.
Weekend brunch. No one should have to explain to you, gentle reader, the glory that is al fresco breakfast food.
Emotional availability. I haven’t been available at all. I know that. My friends and family know that. I like to be available. I thrive when I am. I’m working my way back into that.
The. Gym. I sincerely miss the feeling of enjoying getting dressed in the morning...or getting undressed at night, for that matter. *clears throat* Enough said.
Reading. Not text books, not academic journals, not the literature wonk of the wonk field blah. I mean reading stuff I want to read for no reason other than I want to read it. It may be a magazine. It may be friends blogs in google reader. It may be hefty nonfiction. It may be a trashy novel or Rainn Wilson’s tweets. It doesn’t matter. What does matter is that it was not assigned to me and a 20-page paper is not pending.
Creativity. I’ve felt like a creative black hole for a long time and I’m so over it. Blogging. Photography. Traveling with my big camera/lenses. Designing my new condo. Painting. Movies. Community festivals. Creative writing (you wanna talk about something that gets beat out of you in grad school). Live music and my dirty feet dancing in the ampitheatre grass. All of it. I know what that creative spark feels like, and it’s been fleeting at best for years now.
Vacations. Travel that is unrelated to work. I shouldn’t have to explain this.

That’s enough. Of course this list is not comprehensive. It’s not meant to be. It is meant to articulate a starting point. As I piece my once-awesome life back together, and heal the violent experience of grad school, this list holds my touchstones.

This one time, in graduate school...

2011-12-25T19:01:00.004-07:00

[originally posted 07/31/2011 to now-defunct iWeb blog]

I’ve had a thought floating around my head for a while now. Say, for over a year, give or take. The thought? Graduate school is violent. Rephrase: Graduate school was a violent experience for me. And it was partially my fault.

Violent? Violent.

As in, destructive. Forceful. Maddening. Severe. Harsh. Tumultuous. Distressing. Overwhelming. Disturbing. Struggle. Marked by extreme and sudden intense activity.

As in, not gentle, peaceful, moderate, still, or controlled.

Thanks, Thesaurus.com and Merriam-Webster, for providing articulate inspiration. I know, it’s all those astute research skills I learned in graduate school.

Of course there were amazing experiences. Of course there were amazing people that have since become true friends. Of course there were amazing texts and lectures and ah-ha moments. Of course. But guess what? I don’t want to talk about those today. Nope. I just don’t. Today I want to get this whole violence train of thought out of my head and move on.

To clarify, grad school did not exist in a vacuum. I was appointed Interim Director of my organization on the same day I started classes. After months of interviews and search committee machinations, I was offered the full Director position. Suddenly, at age 28, I went from program manager to The Boss with seven professional staff and a 1/2 million dollar budget. I was still consulting for a national/federal organization in D.C. and traveling all over the country every few weeks. Then I decided to buy a condo and become a first time homeowner. I had nothing else going on, after all.

So when I say “violent” I mean the entire experience writ large, as in, the last two years of my life in general. So when I say “destructive. Forceful. Maddening. Severe. Harsh. Tumultuous. Distressing. Overwhelming. Disturbing. Struggle. Marked by extreme and sudden intense activity...” I mean exactly that.

My health - mental, emotional, physical, social, and spiritual - suffered and declined greatly over the past two years. That’s part of the violence I’m referring to. It was a violent time in my life marked by extreme and sudden intense activity...activity that was unbalanced and unhealthy. The word “violence” also works because I genuinely feel that I have to heal from the experience. I regret the way I handled it, but I also didn’t know how else to do it. With everything that I had going on, I retreated into survival mode and powered through with my blinders on. There were plenty of savvier, more well-balanced people in my cohort who may read this and wonder what I’m rambling on about. They may have had an entirely different experience and wonder why I was so incapable of balancing life. That’s okay. I’m not dwelling on it and making comparisons to anyone else; I’m simply naming it, acknowledging how I handled it, and moving on.

Beyond all my book learnin’ and such, the take-away from this meta-analysis of grad school is one of a refiner’s fire. Grad school sucked everything out of my life except for grad school. I was able to boil down over the past two years the bits I’d really like to take back. Everyone who knows me knows that I’m hyper-engaged in...anything and everything I do. I’m a busy person and I fill my life with stuff I love doing, seeing, tasting, experiencing... What grad school did was refine my list of what really really matters. When I finally got a break, what did I want to do? When I decided to blow off my research on Saturday afternoon, who did I want to spend time with? When I’m done and it’s all behind me now, what made it to the top of the list of things that matter most to me?

Enter: Next Post.

Rekindling an old flame

2011-12-25T13:17:00.002-07:00

When I broke up with blogger and then started an iWeb site instead, I did so mainly because I was bored, wanted a challenge, and needed the creative outlet that designing in iWeb provides. Or rather, provided. Past tense being the operative element in that statement. If I understand correctly, with the advent of Apple's iCloud, iWeb is going the way of the buffalo. Cest la vie.

So. Here we are, Blogger, awkwardly running into each other. In the produce section. At 11:47pm. Me in Uggs with no makeup sans bra. You with your bevy of shiny new widgets. You look good. Are you well? I see you've made a lot of changes. I'm proud of you. The time apart worked well for both of us, it would seem.

Rather, it worked well for blogger. I was the moron with the bright idea of starting a new blog in the midst of full-time work, full-time grad school, and constant business travel. Oopsie. All told, I spent a handful of hours taking advantage of the creative design capabilities...but only posted about 30 times in well over a year. Blahblah. I'm back on the blogger bandwagon. No sense looking back.

Except, there are a few posts I want to transfer and use specifically as the jumping off point for future blogging adventures. With that in mind...here goes...

No more blogger. Follow me to my new site...

2010-01-02T22:04:00.005-07:00

Remember when I mused about breaking up with blogger? Well, the time has come.

I'm more or less prepared to roll out my new website. It combines this blog and my photography blog. I know that I will endlessly tweak it, but it's good enough to make the switch and begin to grow into that site.

I understand that very few people visit actual websites anymore, what with RSS and Twitter and all, but nonetheless, design is really important to me. I hope people will bounce on the actual site at least every now and then; fully realizing that most people will simply subscribe to the three different RSS feeds embedded in the site. Even if the design shouts into the void, I'll continue to play with the site and the look/feel of it. I enjoy it and, after all, it's one of the main reasons I'm leaving blogger.

Join me: http://web.me.com/fourthirtyam/mymadeleines/base_camp.html

Blogger, it's not you. It's me.

2009-12-19T13:44:00.004-07:00

Blogger, we need to talk. It's time. I've been flirting with the idea for a while now and that's not fair. My attention has been elsewhere and I haven't treated you how you deserve to be treated. You deserve better. You deserve someone who loves you for who you are. I can't force myself to fall back in love with you. I'm sorry to hurt you, but I'm in love with iWeb. I've changed and I've grown over the past few years and, we've talked about this, you never changed or grew with me. I'm not asking you to be anything but what you are, and I know you'll find billions of users who are highly compatible with you. We had a good run, but we're over.

Coming soon...a brand new blog. Brand new URL/RSS feed. Brand new design. my madeleines and madeleines written with light combined into one uber website. Stay tuned.

Schooooool's OUT. FOR. WIN. TER.

2009-12-19T12:02:00.005-07:00

I did it. First semester of grad school? Done. Working full time and going to school full time kicked my trash a bit, but it's worth it. I put it off for too long and I'm glad I'm finally doing this for myself. Remind me I said that when my student loans are due, but whatever.

The program remains highly innovative and I while I like being the first cohort, there are a few marked disadvantages. I sort of feel like I'm the girl dating this rough-around-the-edges program - the girl who does all the work and whips him into shape and teaches him how to be an amazing program - and then I'll pass him off to the new girl next fall and he'll be all polished and amazing. Story of my life. Anyone? Ladies?

At any rate, for all the program's faults, Westminster is so responsive to students it's almost unreal. You want something changed? Call the program director. Done. You want to make sure something is improved for the cohort next year, shoot the faculty an email about the syllabus. Done.

I had my final two classes this week...and I woke up this morning feeling a bit adrift. You mean I don't have to set my alarm to wake up and start homework? You mean to tell me I don't have a huge paper to finish by Sunday night? Wait, no 300 pages of dry business text? What? I almost don't know what to do with myself. I mean, other than stay in bed all day long and tool around on the interweb.

my life according to facebook

2009-12-19T11:46:00.002-07:00

No, I did not create this. There is a facebook app that generates the status content automatically. I love that my best friend Diane and her husband Andrew ended up in here so many times, but am not thrilled with the other status updates they chose. Still a very cool concept. Something I would like to create myself from scratch, actually.

Oh crap.

2009-12-01T23:28:00.003-07:00

Remember when this could go either way?

Remember when this could fizzle out or turn into a sick, sad obsession.

Well...I'll let you make the call.

Yes, that's an expansion and full remodel with new stoves and a new patio.

Make it stop.

Please help.

Taxi...TAXI!

2009-11-29T21:40:00.002-07:00

I. Love. This. It makes me stir crazy and all wanderlusty.

A note from my past

2009-11-29T21:05:00.004-07:00

Back in August I told you about a website I stumbled onto called Future Me. You write an email to yourself and the site will deliver it on whatever future date you specify. The only rule is that it has to be at least 90 days in the future.

So...way back then...I sent an email to myself as a test. I completely forgot about it in the meantime, and was surprised when my message was delivered last week. Now that I know it's legit...it's game on. I'm going to send all sorts of notes to The Future Me. I absolutely love this idea. The Future Me might get sort of annoyed with The Past Me...but whatever.

Totally addicting waste of time

2009-11-29T16:11:00.005-07:00

So over Thanksgiving weekend my dad showed me his virtual cafe and virtual apartment, encouraging me to become his business partner and neighbor. He introduced me to the Facebook apps Cafe World and YoVille (they're like SIMS lite, more or less). Up until two days ago, I was completely unaware such apps existed. I scoffed and ridiculed him for indulging in such low-brow time wasters. Important people have important things to do, I explained, and I couldn't possibly find the time to play these silly games with him.

Well, about that.

That's a screen shot of the living room in my YoVille apartment. Yeah, I know.

And that's a screen shot of my cafe (aptly named: my madeleines). I know, I know!

But dude, seriously. He tricked me into this addiction by letting me remodel his cafe. He had taken all the starter furniture items and done nothing to the cafe, focusing only on the food served leading to the bottom line dollar. Pssh...that's where I come in. I rocked a remodel and his business went through the roof. "Money well spent," he said as I drained his bank account from over $30,000 to $500. You gotta spend money to make money, I always say.

No. I don't actually say that. I'm not even sure I know what that means.

But I do know what it means to design and decorate. Blame it on the Libra genes or some other inherent esthetic, but I've always been good at it. After remodeling my dad's cafe I held out as long as I could (about three hours) before caving, downloading both apps to my Facebook account, and proceeding to establish my own little virtual empire.

I find it kind of annoying that I have to play stupid games and cook food and work and stuff in order to get enough little gold coins to do what I want to do; which is to say shop and decorate. It's also all well and good that I worked ahead with my homework and had time to indulge this weekend...but I don't wanna think about the mess my little virtual world will be in when work hits the fan tomorrow morning. We'll see if I bother to maintain my addiction or decide to detox.

Bloodsport

2009-11-27T23:01:00.004-07:00

My family is highly competitive. I, thankfully, got the recessive genes and only care to compete with my perfectionist self. However, for the rest of these yahoos, everything from Jeopardy to making it through the soon-to-change traffic light is a very. serious. competition.

Take for instance the pleasant arts & crafts project my mom whipped up for us today: Decorate a gingerbread house. Seems simple enough, but oh no. It was only a matter of time before we were entrenched on opposite sides of the dining room table, men versus women in a battle to the death, our voices raised as we debated the engineering of the graham cracker roof beams.

Shouting trash talk across the table we hurled, "Your Necco roof is not structurally sound!" "Oh yeah? Well your garden path is so not to scale!" Not a hint of irony. Not a whiff of the absurd. We were dead serious.

Just as we thought we were finished with our task, my mother called two different neighbors over to the house for an independent judging commission. The tiebreaker turned to Facebook. A post to my mom's wall, a post to mine. It was on.

House #2 was the women's creation and I don't need to tell you it's clearly better. It also won the Facebook polls by a landslide. I'm just sayin' ...

Beats doing dishes

2009-11-26T23:17:00.004-07:00

My grandparents flew in from California, as they have every Thanksgiving since my family moved to Utah; and we enjoyed the outrageously awesome feast at the Foundry Grill at Sundance Resort. I'm grateful for a family that plays hard, works hard, laughs hard, and loves hard. I'm also grateful that we genuinely enjoy each other's company.

Photos, photos, and more photos.

2009-11-25T20:37:00.005-07:00

It's amazing to watch creativity creep back into my life as I settle into a holiday weekend and enjoy less homework than I've had all semester. I've added 13 more photos to madeleines written with light, such as this camera I found at a flea market in Searsport, Maine.

I can't wait for winter break. I'll have two full weeks paid vacation and a needed break from constant academia. Expect more photos!

I'm gonna get me a navy pea coat...

2009-11-24T08:18:00.006-07:00

Today is the first time I've been cold this season. We've had a lovely Indian summer that melted right into an Indian fall...but now it's snowing and blistering cold outside.

I find myself listening to a lot of Brett Dennen in an effort to boost my spirits. I find this ditty particularly wonderful right now (take a listen, will ya...you won't regret it and you really do need the full effect). No, I'm not in break-up mode, I just find it bouncy and delightful. I'm also hurting for time in San Francisco. It's been too long.

Go, if you want to go;

But I won't follow,

Just so you know.

Leave, if you need to leave;

But I won't be here...

I won't be here when you come home.

I'm gonna to move to San Francisco,

Look up some old friends.

I'm gonna get me a navy pea coat,

And an old Mercedes Benz.

This old town it keeps shrinking.

There's too many people in my junk.

I'm gonna do a lot of drinking,

Cause it don't hurt when I'm drunk.

Go, if you want to go;

But I won't follow,

Just so you know.

Leave, if you need to leave;

But I won't be here...

I won't be here when you come home.

I'm gonna rent me an old Victorian

Down in the Lower Haight.

I'm gonna get me an old accordion

Play for the tourists on the golden gate.

I'm gonna plant a garden.

Paint my bathroom blue.

I'm gonna try real hard

To get over you.

Go, if you want to go;

But I won't follow...

Just so you know.

Leave, if you need to leave;

But I won't be here,

I won't be here when you come home.

Here in the city, life doesn't move so slow.

There's plenty of good people I know.

Up in North Beach they drink spicy Italian liqueur.

Down on Market there's a lot of hobos and the hustlers.

Down in Hayes Valley, there's a lot of real good restaurants.

Deep in the tenderloin you can get anything you want.

Over in The Mission it's always a sunny day.

It's a real good baseball town but my team is across the bay.

Go, if you want to go;

But I won't follow,

Just so you know.

Leave, if you need to leave;

But I won't be here...

I won't be here when you come home.

29. That's right.

2009-11-23T23:19:00.005-07:00

I had a really creative weekend. I spent a lot of time catching up on sleep. I watched a few documentaries that have been on my wishlist for months. I spent serious quality time with muffin, catching up on 3 months of So You Think You Can Dance a'la DVR and making awesome greeting cards. I also hit some sort of photography energy field and finally posted 29 pics from my Maine vacation.

Yes, the vacation I took in June. Finally got to it. I know, I know. Whatever.

Just enjoy...http://madeleineswrittenwithlight.blogspot.com

Getting off gets the crazy out.

2009-11-22T01:27:00.003-07:00

"Hysteria — an exclusively female illness, its name derived from the Greek word for "uterus" — was something of a catchall condition. It was irritability, it was sleeplessness, it was anger, it was feeling solemnity. Any behavior beyond the prescribed feminine ideal. Anything that was pretty much unacceptable to the people around you."

*sigh* Any behavior beyond the prescribed feminine ideal. Seriously. I read this and know that it's in reference to prevailing wisdom of the Victorian 19th Century, but I can't help roll my eyes at the reality that many would presume this text was contemporary. Furthermore, my eyes roll completely out of my skull knowing that many would find nothing objectionable about it.

It pisses me off. Actually.

That's why playwright Sarah Ruhl and I would be friends. Like, if we both lived in New York and ran into each other in a coffee shop or some fabulous dinner party at a mutual friend's loft, we'd end up hanging out. A lot. BFFs, Sarah and I.

Her play, In the Next Room, tells the tale of women who used to visit the doctor for hysteria, the doctor would proceed to...ahem, manually stimulate them, and post-orgasm: voila. No more hysteria.

Sure, this is funny at first. Then, it's really sad. As this NPR piece points out, the play explores issues of intimacy and awareness. "Ruhl centers her play on how we separate out bodily functions and labor and love." I've been ruminating a lot lately on how disconnected women can be from their bodies, how unhealthy I think that is, and how culture/society can perpetuate (and even honor) that disconnection.

Clearly, I'm not the only one to ruminate on such issues as of late. I would've loved to see this play.

Mayer's latest

2009-11-22T01:15:00.004-07:00

I've been getting acquainted with Battle Studies these past few days.

I want to be blown away. I really do what to tell you that my life has changed.

Meh.

I like the album. I like anything John Mayer does. It's just that I know he is an outstanding musician and I was in the mood to be blown away musically. It's clear that this album was a lyrical growth for him, but musically there's not much going on that he couldn't pull off a decade ago. Humph. Maybe that's not fair. There are a few bluesy moments, but nothing compared to his work with the Trio, say.

Oh well, whatever. It's strong, solid Mayer. I'll be blown away next time.

...and while we're on the topic

2009-11-22T01:09:00.001-07:00

That's all.

oh. my. my.

2009-11-22T01:02:00.002-07:00

Yes, please.

A real life vacay

2009-11-21T16:15:00.004-07:00

All my frivolous web surfing this weekend is reminding me of more relaxed days. I did sneak a vacay into my hectic semester. Since MBA classes are 7-weeks, with a one-week break between them, I decided there was nothing for me to do but run away to Florida. You should know by now that I'm as behind on photo processing as I always am. At some point I'll post to the photo blog, and at some point I'll share vacay stories here, but in the meantime...

I just had to revisit this glorious image. That's where I sat for a week avoiding all things productive. Ahhhhh yes.

I text allegiance to the flag...

2009-11-21T16:11:00.004-07:00

I text allegiance to the flag of the United States Of American Apparel and to the facebook for which it friends, one nation, OMG, indivizzibizzle, with Liberty and Jonas for all.

(Stephen Colbert)

Socialnomics

2009-11-21T16:08:00.001-07:00

I couldn't care less about the make-more-money economic argument, just not my thing; but the social capital argument, hell yes. Welcome to the future of organizing.

Two words: Esperanza. Spalding.

2009-11-21T16:03:00.004-07:00

Time to buy every note of music Esperanza Spalding has ever touched. Thanks, White House. You're like my hip friend who recommends all the best music.

Until you have seen a deaf girl dance...

2009-11-21T16:00:00.003-07:00

White. House. Poetry. Jam. Enough said.

"Until you have seen a deaf girl dance, you know nothing of passion."

Coming up for air

2009-11-21T15:49:00.002-07:00

Grad School.

One MBA class down. Got a solid A grade and flattering kudos from the professor. I've been knocking out A grades on all my MA Community Leadership course assignments. My new MBA course is going well and I rocked an A on the first assignment. All is well. It's hard. I love it. It takes every single spare moment of my time. It's worth it.

Work.

The director of my department left the college in September. I was appointed Interim Director. This is in addition to everything else I do for my already more-than-full-time job and the new federal grant I'm managing. It's a great opportunity and I'm in the right place at the right time, but it's wearing me out. I now manage 7 staff members and a $400,000 budget. In addition...in addition... *sigh*

That's that.

I have a light homework weekend. This hasn't happened since...well, since I started grad school. I took this time to clean my apartment. No. That's a lie. I took this time to surf the web and watch hours of hulu. I'm about to dump a lot of neat interweb finds on this blog.

Ready. Set. Go.

Ahhhhhh cafe...

2009-10-12T15:30:00.004-06:00

When I ordered hot chocolate with a raspberry turnover, the Beautiful Man behind the counter at la boulangerie said something rapidly in French. I nodded and smiled and stared blankly at his dimples. He then went about his business.

Apparently, whatever the Beautiful Man was saying in French, it translates as: "Would you like the hot chocolate to be served in a bowl as large as your face?"

"I would. I would."

Dinner at the market

2009-10-11T16:19:00.006-06:00

I love the rhythm of cities: Locals (not tourists) fill up the market stalls at the end of the day and begin walking home with fresh greens and a warm baguette poking out of their tote, flowers under their arm. I like to fantasize about the chic lofts in which they'll have their friends over for a dinner party.

My little slice of urban nirvana? Byward Market...and my hotel room. Not quite as sexy, but I still dig it.

First stop, the continental delicatessen for a bit of thin, dry, mid-spice Hungarian salami. Next, la boulangerie for heavenly butter croissants. Quick stop at a fruit stand, then off to la fromagerie for an aged 4-year raw milk cheddar from Montreal and La Sauvagine from Saint-Raymon de Portneuf (Grand Champion of the 5th Canadian Cheese Grand Prix).

Dude. I know. A Grand Prix of Cheese. Seriously.

Oh...and I topped it off with an "Obama Cookie" - because when Obama came to Ottawa he went to the boulangerie and ordered the maple leaf sugar cookie, took a photo with the staff, and gave them infamous cache for years to come.

Flip the Script

2009-10-09T20:10:00.005-06:00

Amazing what happens when you let yourself vent.

ca·thar·sis \kə-ˈthär-səs\
1. purification of the emotions primarily through art
2. purification that brings about spiritual renewal or release from tension
3. elimination of a complex by bringing it to consciousness and affording it expression

I don't know why it took me so long*, but I'm done. Time to flip the script. United Airlines sucks. My bag is god knows where. I lost two days to this mess. All still true. But you know what else is true?

I have a job (when many are not so fortunate right now), and that job is cool enough to send me to another country for a conference.
I am in an urban nirvana of Eurotrashiness and I need to hit the pavement and dig it!
The airline says they have at least located my bag. It may never make it to Ottawa. I may only see it weeks after I'm home. Who the hell knows...but they found it.
My hotel is swanky. The devil is in the details and I'm relishing the suede armchairs, super fluffy bed, and free upgrade to 11th floor view of Parliament.
I'm not rolling in leisure cash, but the not insignificant twice over triple digit figure required to bring me back to bare minimum essentials is still manageable. I'm fortunate that I have even a small amount of financial flexibility.
The men here are hot. hot. hot.
My room service dinner rocked.
Canadians are probably the politest people I've ever met. Ever. Like, it's unnerving.
I still have three days to turn this around.

Ahhhhh. Another catharsis.

*recovering from the flu, work pressures through the roof, school assignments and readings hitting peak mid-semester levels, I'm just off my game.

en route...

2009-10-08T22:25:00.007-06:00

So yesterday morning my alarm goes off at 4:00am. I get up, do my thing, taxi comes at 5:00, check in, get through security, and I'm hanging out at my gate by 6:00am. After an hour or so the PA system squawks: "United Flight ### is delayed by at least two hours. We'll call you up individually to rebook. Do not come to the counter." A collective murmur rumbles through the terminal. Cell phones blaze to life, people rush to get in line despite the explicit request...

Seriously? Seriously.

Fast forward two hours. Yes. Two. I'm finally called up and they make whatever arrangement they make so I'm still on United, still through Chicago, arriving in Ottawa three hours later than planned. Annoying, but manageable. I sit back down, resign myself to the fact that there's nothing I can do, and start catching up on email.

Fast forward an hour and a half. Yes. An hour and a half. The PA squawks at me to come to the desk. The girl hands me a Delta boarding pass. Yes. Delta. She says, "You need to hurry. You're going to Vancouver on Delta." I stared at her with a confounded expression. I finally reply, "You need to explain. I'm going to Ottawa on United." "No," she says with a huge grin and a giggle. "This is the best plan, okay. Go on Delta now. It's in E Terminal. Hurry."

Seriously? Seriously.

At this point I've been sitting in the United B9 gate for four and a half hours. Yes. Four and a half. I look at my Delta boarding pass, shake my head at the E75 gate, and start running. Until I see one of the golf cart guys. Then I start riding, waving cash in his face as we whiz past asthmatic grandmothers coveting my chauffeur.

I slide into my seat with no time to spare and I'm off to Vancouver. This means that I'm flying 2 hours west, opposite of the direction I should be heading. It does not escape my annoyed attention that I will soon be flying back across those same two hours of sky. Sisyphus ain't got nothin' on this day.

So I arrive in Vancouver, where I need to wind my way through customs and send my bag through Canadian security. Except my bag isn't there. Of course it's not. I sound like a raving lunatic trying to explain that I was supposed to be on a United flight, but ended up taking a Delta flight, and now I'm going to miss my Air Canada flight and no, I don't know where my bag is, and yes, I do realize Ottawa is on the other side of the country. Um yeah, the customs agent loved me. On top of it, I've been sick and my fever broke in the chaos of the Vancouver airport. So, as it turns out, I was a sweaty raving lunatic who lost her bag and has travel plans on three different airlines.

There was nothing I could do about my bag except hope that it somehow made its way to Ottawa. I board my plane and fly back over those two hours of sky, flipped the bird at the United agents below me in Salt Lake, and made my way across the entire length of Canada. I did get to marvel at the snow-capped Rockies twice...

I land in Ottawa five hours later. Yes. Five. I was supposed to arrive at 4:30. At this point it's 10:30. I went straight to the lost baggage service counter and filed a claim. I again got to be the raving lunatic trying to explain my sporadic itinerary. They can't find my bag. They think it's in Chicago, but maybe Detroit, did it get loaded in Salt Lake, should we call United, maybe call Delta, but I'm at the Air Canada counter, and on and on and on as such for a long time...

I'm given a claim number and I hail a cab to just get me to the hotel already. My friend had been in Ottawa since Wednesday, and had been tracking my ordeal en route. After checking in I went to her room to unwind and bitch about my day. She surprised me with a hilarious greeting card and temporary tattoos from the Iowa State Fair (long story, but they made my night). I surprised her with my man bag.

Yes. My man bag. When I left the baggage service counter they gave me "a complimentary kit to help you settle." Really? What's in the kit? MY LUGGAGE?! No, not my luggage, just man treats.

Stinky man deodorant, shaving cream, a white undershirt, and a weird combrushpickthing. I was grateful for the kid's toothbrush, but Speedstick?

Fast forward nearly 24 hours, still no bag. At this point I'm on a first name basis with the Air Canada helpline and have figured out the menu sequence that lets me bypass the automated system, though listening to French telephone operators is actually quite charming. My latest phone call to them (8:30EST) revealed that my bag is in CHICAGO. AWESOME. The conference starts at 8:00am tomorrow and my bag is in CHICAGO.

I blame United. At the end of the day, it's ultimately United's fault. I have been looking forward to this trip for 6 months now. I'm a stellar traveler and planned to hit the ground running...museums, cafes, photo walks, conference sessions, and work meetings. I've traveled all over the world and never had luggage lost before and it's frustrating me that it's throwing me for such a loop. Thursday was a wash because I was en route the entire #$%*&@! day. Today was a wash because I was so disoriented it was all I could do to find clothes, shoes, a drug store.

I can only hope my bag comes in from Chicago tonight. I so want to put these two days behind me and look forward to three great days in Canada's capitol.

Something terrible is happening

2009-09-27T22:40:00.001-06:00

Protect Insurance Companies PSA from Will Ferrell

More Little Things, Or Fall Leaves

2009-09-27T20:47:00.005-06:00

I live 10 minutes from some of the most beautiful canyons on Planet Earth. Ask me how often I make it up there. On second thought, don't ask me. Just know that I at least took advantage of the splendor this afternoon. I still had my yoga buzz on and I couldn't bear the thought of going home to more Organizational Behavior texts. I turned right back around and went up Emigration Canyon, then up East Canyon to the Milford County line.

You know those moment, every so often, when you stop and think: "Wait. This is me. This is absolutely me, centered, happy, who I'm supposed to be..." I have those moments when I'm behind my camera. I have those moments when I'm alone in nature. I have those moments when I'm volunteering, at a community festival, or sleeping in on a chilly Saturday morning with no agenda bearing down on me. You know those moments, whatever they are for you. I felt such peace up the canyon today and it was the perfect capstone to my yoga buzz.

I sat in the same space for about 20 minutes, completely rapt by the colors and shifting tones of the warm sunset. The difference is subtle, but 20 minutes after the photo above was taken, I snapped the shot below. Can you just taste that sunset? I streaks across the sky like hot buttah.

The Little Things

2009-09-27T20:01:00.004-06:00

The ubiquitous "little things" have always been important to me; but during this particular phase of acute stress, the little things aren't simply important to me, they've become absolutely essential. With reference to concurrently tackling a career and full-time grad school, I go through waves of panic, contentment, overwhelming stress, confidence, on and on, blahbity blah. The list of things that need to get done on both fronts is literally endless. I could easily do nothing but work, class, study, work, class, study, rinse, repeat...and many days I do just that. For the sake of sanity, however, the reality of that cycle means I have to make more of an effort, be more intentional, to find pleasure in the little things.

Enter: Yoga. I've been practicing yoga for a decade now, but in those 10 years I've only a few times hit the stride of consistency I'd like. I feel the same way about massage. I need both weekly, if not multiple times each week, but you can guess how often I do either.

Well, I hit a wall today. I hit a wall after drafting an MBA team effectiveness analysis paper. That wall was called: Enough Already. That wall was also called: Business Writing is Soulless and I Can't Take it Anymore. I shut down the computer, gave myself permission to take a break, and went to a 90-minute relax & release class. I cried for a good 20 minutes in the middle there.

Yup. Cried. Don't know why. Apparently as I let myself relax, it wasn't only my muscles that needed to be released. I'm lying on my back in frog pose, looking like I'm either giving birth, having totally rockin' sex, or enduring a pap smear, when I started to cry. The water works continued as I rolled up and over into full child's pose. It wasn't a distracting sob, in fact I doubt anyone even noticed, but as I centered my breath, I couldn't stop the tears.

There's something beautiful about that, but there's also something really disturbing about it. I'm tense to the point that a simple yoga pose tips me off my rocker? Not cool. What this teaches me (again) is that I can't let life get to the point that I hit That Wall before I pay attention to taking care of myself. If I took time for myself more consistently, rather than saving it all up for one enormously cathartic yoga class, maybe the sensation of relaxation wouldn't be so novel.

Work on that.

Proust was a neuroscientist

2009-09-19T21:56:00.003-06:00

People who stumble on my blog invariably ask, "Why madeleines? Is it a cooking blog?" Nope. Not in the least. This little ditty will explain the blog title. That little ditty will also explain why this makes me unspeakably happy.

“Marks the arrival of an important new thinker, who finds in the science and the arts wonder and beauty, and with equal confidence says wise and fresh things about both” (Los Angeles Times Book Review). Science and Arts combined in one beautiful man who addresses my passion for Proust in moving prose? My head's going to explode. I need to finish grad school tomorrow so I'll actually have time to read this masterpiece.

This video is Jonah talking about his first book, but fascinating stuff nonetheless. It gives you a sense of who he is, which...

The Colbert Report

Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Jonah Lehrer

www.colbertnation.com

Colbert Report Full Episodes

Political Humor

Health Care Protests

...in semi-related news: My crush on Jonah Lehrer is evolving to the point of near constant distraction. I want him to whisper "metacognition" in my ear. Like, a lot of times. Gonna pretend I don't see that wedding ring.

Moments

2009-09-19T21:47:00.002-06:00

This video "is evidence that the things we see everyday, when carefully framed, can ache with ignored beauty." Ache with ignored beauty? That's the most beautiful phrase I've come across in a long time. Same goes for this video.

I first saw the video on this site. The filmmaker maintains this site.

Dude.

2009-09-19T21:32:00.006-06:00

So my graduate program? Not. Messing. Around. It's a small cohort. It's challenging. It's an incredible amount of work.

And I love it.

And I'm overwhelmed by it.

And I know I made the right decision.

And everything I'm learning is IMMEDIATELY applicable to my life, my passions, and my career.

And my classmates are awesome.

And I have absolutely no social life.

None.

And my professors are pushing us and asking that we grow and keep up.

And I love that.

And I'm so @#$%&!* exhausted.

The End.

Westminster & Sugarhouse

2009-09-19T21:21:00.002-06:00

I have really mixed feelings about this. I went to Westminster for my BA, lived on campus at the time, and have lived in Sugarhouse ever since. As a ten year resident of this community, and as an alumni that has strong feelings for/about Westminster, this development is a mixed bag.

(I apologize you have to watch Fox News on this blog)

Public Option Now

2009-09-08T11:20:00.003-06:00

It is beyond me, in all seriousness, how people can hear the stories, see the photos, read news articles, follow up with their own research, and still not understand the alarming state of healthcare in this country.

It's immoral to me. Period.

Public Option Now.

If you know your representative in Congress, call/email/tweet her/him. If you would like to call a general line, dial #202-224-3121 and tell them: PUBLIC OPTION NOW.

Dad, cool it with the twitter updates.

2009-09-06T12:24:00.002-06:00

Hilarious. It's the interaction between the dad and his son that kills me. My parents are all over social media and it doesn't bother me at all. Still, there's a stroke of genius in this commercial.

Smashburger, are you kidding me?

2009-09-05T20:50:00.007-06:00

Dude. Seriously.

So I've been hearing a lot of buzz about Smashburger. Since I don't eat red meat, I wasn't exactly seduced by the hype. Then a promotional mailer came announcing my new Sugarhouse location...and I noticed smashchicken on the menu. Alright, fine. I'm game.

It changed my life. I kid you not. It's tender. It's juicy. It's perfectly seasoned. The melted cheese runneth over. The smashfries are by far the best fries I've had in years. Thin, crispy, seasoned with rosemary and other assorted sprinklings. Oh my.

Though I cannot personally attest to the deliciousness of the beefy smashburgers, my dinner companion assures me they're divine. My word, not his. His words were more along the lines of, "Ooooommmm mmmm gggurrrgh mmmm gaaaahhh mmmm..." or something like that. More or less.

A Community of Engaged Scholars

2009-09-05T20:08:00.004-06:00

This past week I had my first session of my first MA Community Leadership class: Exploring Communities. I sort of got a sense of the program's cohort at orientation, but not really. This was, essentially, the first time we were all meeting and had any substantial introduction to each other. As we went around the room describing our "passion issues" and goals for using our degree, I had a fleeting moment of intimidation. These are some seriously sharp, compassionate, inspiring people. We have careers in everything from homeless outreach to public healthcare, from advocates of women's rights to programers of youth arts initiatives. We plan to pursue everything from wilderness camps for adults with disabilities to refugee resettlement, from working abroad with environmental resource groups to starting community gardens in our own neighborhoods of SLC.

I say my intimidation was fleeting because I realized, more and more and we moved around the circle, that I'd come home. I don't mean "come home" only in the sense that once upon a time I earned my BA from Westminster College, although that's part of it. I mean "come home" in the sense that I've been thrust into a community of like-minded people. There's no reason at all for me to be intimidated; these are My People. I love my MBA class, don't get my wrong, it's difficult and it's pushing me and I'm learning a lot; but the contrast between that experience and my MACL course cannot be more stark.

The first thing the MACL students did, before the professors even made it to the classroom, was arrange the tables/chairs into a conversation circle. The professors showed up with hummus, pita, and apples from the downtown farmer's market for our halftime break. The room we meet in is full of different colored chairs, funky modern furniture, and soft lighting. The sterilized mock board room of the MBA class makes perfect sense, but it would never fly for this course. We hadn't been in class an hour before the huge post-its and markers came out and we were told to "draw Utah and it's historical, contemporary, and future social issues." Some people were literal, some people scribbled away with a mess of abstract blobs and colors, then we all engaged in hours of conversation about our world, our politics, our thoughts on Loeb's "Soul of a Citizen"

The MACL class is no less intense than the MBA class, in fact the readings and assignments are just about on par, but it has a completely different feel. And that feeling is home.

In honor of Ted Kennedy

2009-08-31T09:20:00.003-06:00

"For all those whose cares have been our concern, the work goes on,
the cause endures, the hope still lives, and the dream shall never die."

Senator Ted Kennedy (22 February 1932 – 25 August 2009)

A statement in the eulogy delivered by President Obama:

"What we can do is to live out our lives as best we can with purpose, with love, and with joy. We can use each day to show those who are closest to us how much we care about them, and treat others with the kindness and respect that we wish for ourselves. We can learn from our mistakes and grow from our failures. And we can strive at all costs to make a better world, so that someday, if we are blessed with the chance to look back on our time here, we know that we spent it well; that we made a difference; that our fleeting presence had a lasting impact on the lives of others. This is how Ted Kennedy lived. This is his legacy."

When Death Comes

2009-08-29T13:10:00.004-06:00

When it's over, I don't want to wonder

if I have made of my life something particular, and real.

I don't want to find myself sighing and frightened,

or full of argument.

I don't want to end up simply having visited this world.

(Mary Oliver, When Death Comes)

Thomas Moore wrote that the soul "is not a thing, but a quality or a dimension of experiencing life and ourselves. It has to do with depth, value, relatedness, heart, and personal substance."

What personal substance do you bring to your interactions with people? What depth and value to do contribute to this world, such that you are not simply a visitor? I hope we never tire of reflecting on these questions. I also hope I never settle on one solid answer.

Soul Food

2009-08-29T11:17:00.005-06:00

I absolutely chose the right graduate program. I'm so at home and so in the zone right now. I haven't even been to my first MA Community Leadership class yet and I can tell you it's going to rock my world.

Paul Rogat Loeb is something of an academic celebrity in the service-learning world. I've had his "Soul of a Citizen" on my shelf for nearly a decade. It's a seminal work in the field and to be taken seriously in any degree, you have to have at least a working understanding of this text. However, I had never sat down and read it cover to cover. Until now. It's one of the texts in my Exploring Communities class. The fact that I can read Loeb in an academic context, get credit for it, write papers on it, discuss it with others, makes me so happy I could scream.

It's a very interesting contrast to be reading Loeb and an endless stack of MBA texts at the same time. I love my MBA class - the theories and perspectives are dense and interesting and challenging - but when I read Loeb, I've come home.

From page 24: "Sadly, and ironically, in a country born of a democratic political revolution, the be American today is to be apolitical. Civic withdrawal has become our norm. To challenge this requires courage. It also requires creating a renewed definition of ourselves as citizens - something closer to the nation of active stakeholders that leaders like Thomas Jefferson had in mind." Um, I'm sorry. Is that Loeb or my blog speaking? Honestly. Reading this book is like hanging out with an old friend.

Speaking of, I need to get back to it. I'll leave you with this thought:

"In regard to cruelties committed in the name of a free society, some are guilty, while all are responsible." (Rabbi Abraham Heschel)

It's kind of like being pregnant

2009-08-27T23:36:00.003-06:00

Only not really. But you know what I mean. When you're pregnant you can ride that excuse for a good 9 months, 12 if you play your cards right. Well, I'm going to ride grad school all the way to the finish line as far as excuses are concerned. For instance, WiFi.

I have been perfectly content to have a WiFi/cable/telephone free house. I made a work-life balance decision years ago. For me that meant no internet and no temptation to bring work home and pull 18 hour days. My blackberry was sufficient and though it was inconvenient at times to not be able to surf at home, whatever. Well...with mounds and mounds of coursework online, I have no choice at this point. I finally caved. Welcome to the 21st century, Self. I hooked me up some WiFi tonight. Word.

...and I immediately proceeded to waste my night away with hours of hulu. My WiFi did not lead me to check my course discussion boards. I did not log-on to my school email account. All I researched tonight was Dating in the Dark, More to Love, The Office, and Dr. Horrible (for the 1,382 time). I watched more 'television' tonight than I've watched all year. Oy.

The novelty of this crazy thing y'all call the internets better wear off soon; I gots major studyin to do.

Certainly seems easier...

2009-08-27T16:00:00.002-06:00

Yes. I'm THAT nerd.

2009-08-27T14:38:00.004-06:00

I went to my first graduate class last night, MBA 605 Executive Development. In a roundabout way I've expressed my [mild] reservations about the whole interdisciplinary factor of my program; essentially my reservations about MBA culture and what I can expect from my course work and interactions with classmates. It's a foreign world to me - and not because I don't know anything about it, but rather, because I do. The foreign-to-me factor is entirely by choice.

I'm completely willing to approach it with an open mind, and to be honest, I'm most excited about the MBA piece of my program. I'm most excited because I have reservations. Having reservations means it's a challenge. I typically excel under pressure and why would I pay buckets of money to learn stuff I already know?

Well, I can now report that I love it. I so love it. I'm not dry cleaning my power suits just yet, but there's a certain latent acumen that is thanking me for finally doing this. I wasn't horribly creeped out by anyone in my class. I wasn't intimidated by the course material (though I was caught flat footed by the timeline of assignments for the first night of class*). I just loved every minute of it. The class is intense. The discussions are challenging. I love it.

In case you're wondering what I'm doing in class on a Wednesday night, when I've told you that night has been set aside for SYTYCD and GLEE: oopsie. Long story short there was a miscommunication with my schedule and up until my Monday night orientation, I thought I was in the Monday night section of the Executive Development course. Surprise! I started school sooner than I thought, but it's all good. That's what hulu is for, right? Anyone know how to get full SYTYCD episodes online? I don't have the patience to piece together YouTube clips.

* MACL students were not given our online log-in information (ANGEL) until orientation Monday night. Professors had been posting syllabi and assignments since mid-August. They expect you to come to class the first night fully prepared with, in the case of my MBA course, 100-ish pages of reading completed and three short essays posted to the online discussion board. So here I am Monday night logging onto ANGEL, my stomach dropping to my knees as I realize what I have to pull off in a day's time. I was at a Jackson Browne concert Tuesday night and Wednesday was the first day of classes at my institution as well. Needless to say, my office was hopping...and I was reading fast and furious. I'm proud to say that I read all 100+ pages and posted all three essays by 3:30pm Wednesday. From now on, I'm going to be done with Wednesday's homework by Sunday night. What a rough way to kick off the experience. It's all a cakewalk from here (famous last words).

Hello, baby.

2009-08-24T15:37:00.004-06:00

...and speaking of all that time I'm going to be spending on the computer...

I'm now the proud mama of a new 15" MacBook Pro. I'm working on the Leopard OS, with Snow Leopard coming in a week or so. She purrs along with a 2.8 GHz Intel Core 2 Duo processor and 4 GB of memory. I can finally store my photos and music on the same machine (novel concept) with an enormous 500 GB hard drive.

Also, I'm most excited about the gorgeous NVIDIA GeForce 9400M graphics card. I've outgrown iPhoto and I'm currently playing around in Aperture 2. I want to freak out with glee every time I see my photos displayed on this computer. Dude. Seriously.

It's a professional system, Aperture is, so I'm just trying to get my bearings. I know I'm going to love it! This is just a quick sample of something I played with last night. I took this photo @ Thanksgiving Point Gardens.

this post sponsored by nelnet, the lender of my graduate student loans...

loans which made this sexy new set-up possible.

Today.

2009-08-24T15:26:00.004-06:00

Today is the day. The orientation for my MA Community Leadership program is tonight. Classes start next week. Here goes nothing...

I feel relatively prepared. With me it's all about decreasing the intensity of the unknown. It's amazing how calming it is for me to put pen to paper and highlight a routine...and then highlight it again and again via two paper planners, iCal on my MacBook, then syncing it all to my blackberry. (Yes, I know there are medications for that. No, I'm not interested). I'm going to be outrageously busy, but at least it's consistent. I figure if I can survive three years of non-stop travel, I can survive a complete absence of leisure time and loads of interesting homework. Yes, I said interesting. I'm sincerely excited about my courses and I can't wait to dig into the curriculum.

This first semester includes three courses. Exploring Communities is my first MACL cohort course. For the first time ever I'll be on the other side of the service-learning equation. Now I get to be the student who stresses about negotiating an additional volunteer commitment on top of a full-time job, full-time school, and life in general. Ah yes, it all comes full circle. I'm also taking two MBA courses: Executive Development, and The Nonprofit Organization. I'm intrigued to see how I handle MBA courses. I'm not worried about the courses being difficult, necessarily, just different. Completely out of my comfort zone. I have a degree in English and Philosophy, and have been working with social justice issues in public higher-ed for the past seven years. In other words: I've spent my entire adult life avoiding all-things MBA. Or I should say, avoiding all things I assign to my biased stereotype of MBA culture. Should be interesting. I hope I'm proven wrong.

With reference to my schedule, I'm being very intentional about planning for balance. I know my limits. I know how I burn out. I know what makes me happy and what centers me. I'm doing my best to take all of that into account. For instance, color-coded in green I've blocked out Wednesday night for the gym, So You Think You Can Dance, and GLEE. I plan to be as loyal to that silly television schedule as I will be to my coursework. I am booking all sorts of gym time, alone, with friends, and with a trainer (all yellow, in case you're curious). I'm keeping my volunteer commitment with Tabesha's ESL lessons, though only every other week now (blue, because I know you care). I've planned a vacation to white sand beaches in October and I'm going to enjoy it guilt-free (purple, just move on). The blogger/picasa photo issue completely derailed my plans to blog about my travel, but I plan to forge ahead regardless. It may take me months and months to pull it off, but I will document my travel. In the meantime, however, I plan to blog in realtime. What a novel concept. Who knew it was possible? I need the outlet and I know I'll be spending more than enough time on the computer studying, I might as well balance that out with something creative.

So that's that. If you made it this far in reading this post, you deserve a medal. This was definitely one of those posts that was for my benefit, because I needed to hear myself say it (er...watch myself type it). As I keep myself in check over the next four months, I'm sure I'll read and re-read my well laid plans...

Note to Self

2009-08-20T10:02:00.003-06:00

Dear Self...

No, scratch that.

Dear Future Self...

Go ahead. Your turn.

With every lesson learned...

2009-08-20T09:45:00.004-06:00

As I'm sorting through emails this morning, I opened a message from National Geographic. They are announcing their 2009 International Photography Contest and this photo was their lead image:

I immediately fell in love with her. What an incredible image. I also starting singing:

"With every lesson learned, a line upon your beautiful face. We'll amuse ourselves one day with these memories we'll trace..." (Indigo Girls, Get Out the Map)

In Memory of Dr. King

2009-08-15T16:57:00.012-06:00

"An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines

of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity."

One of my favorite outings in Atlanta was to the grave of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. He is buried (along with Coretta) next to his beloved Ebenezer Baptist Church.

Nearby there is a national park memorial that highlights Dr. King's work toward social justice and his focus on non-violent civil disobedience. This is by far one of the most interactive, interesting exhibits I've ever seen. My favorite feature was a life-sized replica of a civil rights march: Freedom Road. You are encouraged to walk amongst the statues, up a paved hill made to look like a city street, toward the sound of protest songs.

Yeah, I teared up.

"...when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!""

Coffee Shop Collective

2009-08-15T16:50:00.003-06:00

Seriously, how adorable is this place? It was a surprise find we stumbled upon in Atlanta. It's a coffee shop, bakery, printing press, all sorts of little artist's boutiques sharing the same space. The only delineation between artists/vendors was the wall color and sometimes the rugs on the floor. The central space was a communal spot to hang out...and by far the most comfortable set up I've ever seen. I've spent more than my fair share of time in coffee shops across this great nation and this hodgepodge of old, comfy living room furniture takes the cake!

Knock on wood

2009-08-15T16:46:00.005-06:00

I don't want to jinx my good luck...but I just posted "Highlight at The High" with three photos! I've been having major issues with blogger lately, namely dealing with the photo upload function.

I'm going to try another post and see if it was just a fluke. Cross your fingers.

Hopefully...I'm back in the game!

Highlight at The High

2009-08-15T16:38:00.004-06:00

I fell completely in love with this piece at The High. Can't you just feel the texture? I really wanted to lick it. But I didn't.

you HAVE to be kidding me...

2009-08-11T10:11:00.004-06:00

(identical post on madeleines written with light)

So yeah. Remember that goal I set? I was going to blog the past six months of travel before Labor Day. Um, about that.

At least this time it's not my fault. I set aside the time, even went out of my way to create time in my schedule to knock this project out. I prepped massive amounts of photos. I was ready to rock n' roll.

Then blogger freaked out.

I haven't been able to post photos for weeks now. Weeks. In Blog Time, that's like 17 years. I get the same annoying error message each time and I've tried absolutely everything I can to work around it. No luck. I finally gave up and visited the blogger help site. As it turns out, not so helpful. It's a cool concept, but no dice. It's a community site, with users answering each other's questions and the occasional blogger staffer jumping in. I was basically shouting into the void.

Along came twitter.

I tweeted my frustration into what I thought was another void, but at least I could direct my comments @blogger #help #likenow. A helpful woman named Siobhan chimed in with all sorts of suggestions (many I had already tried, but she obviously knew her stuff so I went with it). I found out later she's actually a blogger staffer who tweets and she picked up on the @blogger I threw out into the tweetsphere. She took it as far as she could then passed me off to a rock star named Brett. Brett and I tweaked and troubleshooted and are now tweaking some more. With no luck.

The Picasa team has been called in.

Honestly. I'm such a small fish in the blogging universe. I just wanna post a few photos. The epicness of the situation is getting old. I know Brett is working on the issue from his end and I hope there are some crafty Picasa techs attacking it as well. At any rate, epic or not, I sincerely appreciate the help. I'm so grateful to be off the community help site and in the capable hands of actual geeks.

And so we wait.

Hotlanta

2009-07-23T11:09:00.010-06:00

Waaaay back in January I took a trip to Atlanta, Georgia. The trip was split evenly between business and pleasure. The business bit does not make for enticing blog fodder - conducted workshops, trainings, and other assorted consulting stuff at three different community colleges in the greater metro-region - but the pleasure bit is blog worthy.

In addition to exciting professional strides, I have my three-year consulting project to thank for some of my favorite friends. Sean and Jeff live in Atlanta, Jennifer lives in Portland (Oregon), and I live in Salt Lake City; but for the past three years we've been all over the country together. In January, Sean invited Jennifer and I to his institution to do consulting blahblah work...so we of course added vacation days onto our trip. This also means we crashed Sean and Jeff's living room. That means I literally had to be restrained from rolling around on the painted cement floors and licking the exposed brick walls. Oh my, how I love lofts. At any rate, there was a lot of Rock Band, a lot of amazing food, and a lot of amazing art. I wish I could tell you there were a lot of amazing photographs, but I wasn't quite on my photo game this trip. But here are a few I enjoy:

Turn left at The Big Chicken. Just down the street from The Big Chicken. Around the corner from The Big Chicken. Meet me at The Big Chicken. You get the idea: This campy landmark was our Marietta touchstone.

Atlanta is most definitely a foodie paradise (and no, I'm not referring to the ginormous KFC used purely for directional purposes). Unfortunately, as previously confessed, I wasn't as good about taking food photos as I usually am. Alas, I can't share with you the orgasmic truffle mac n' cheese that lives on only in memory. I can't begin to describe the pork that fell off the bone onto my plate in the Two urban licks revamped warehouse (yup, I ate pork....it was THAT good!). And I can't induce fits of sloppy screen-licking with photos of my brunch at The Flying Biscuit (shout out to fellow Indigo Girls fanatics!). However, I can offer a glance at the signage. Now come on, that's an awesome consolation prize, am I right?

In addition to eating ourselves into a coma, we indulged our artsy side. We poked around in an awesome artist collective called Donna Van Gogh's. I purchased a piece by local folk artist Kirk Stansbury that now hangs in my hallway and brings me smiles every day. Someday I'll remember to post a photo of it here. In short: it's a painting on recycled plywood of an upright acoustic guitar, "Make ya own music" scribbled across the top of the board. It's joyful...as is the DVG facade.

We also visited The High Museum of Art. It was fortunate happenstance that we were there at the same time as China's Terracotta Army (hyperlink leads to great article and informative video...I'm saying it's worth clicking, in other words). Reading about these soldiers in Art History texts or loosely studying them in a Philosophy of War course does not begin to do justice to the experience of seeing them live. It was incredible. The detail on these life-size carvings is staggering. As I understand it, there are a certain number of molds for the bodies, but each and every head/face is uniquely hand-cast. Unreal...particularly when you consider the sheer number of soldiers!

No, this is not my photo. I stole it from a Google image search, actually lifted it off a blog that also stole it from some unknown primary source. Sorry...shhhhh. This shows a teeny tiny fraction of the soldiers unearthed in China. Amazing.

Master of Arts in Community Leadership

2009-07-19T16:02:00.003-06:00

It has been over seven years since I graduated with my BA in English from Westminster College. I've missed the brick, ivy, and small classes from the moment I left. I've built a great career in higher-ed in the meantime - and life has been non-stop work momentum since I graduated - but I've always wanted to go back to school. Westminster didn't have a graduate program that was right for my field however and so I've flirted off and on with a number of grad school options over the years. I found a few potential programs, but was never able to take a breather from work long enough to give it any real thought.

Well, this spring a number of factors came together to form the perfect storm. 1) My consulting gig (ie: the cause of my constant travel) just wrapped in July; and 2) Westminster announced the creation of a new grad program that just so happens to be the perfect fit for my field: Master of Arts in Community Leadership (MACL). Long story short: I went through the motions of debating it (because I knew it was perfect for me and it was all but a done deal), I went for it, was accepted, enrolled, signed my student loan papers with my sweet red blood, and I begin the next chapter of my life on 24 August.

The genius concept behind the MACL program is that it is entirely interdisciplinary. In addition to taking Community Leadership courses, I'll also take MBA courses, as well as courses in the MA Professional Communication program. I could take courses in the MA Public Health program if I felt so inclined, but it's not my focus.

I would love to do nothing with my life but focus on school, but alas, that was a rare privilege known exclusively to my residential undergrad life. I'll still have my full-time job...I'll just replace my consulting travel with full-time enrollment in grad school. If all goes as planned I'll be done Spring 2011.

So in reference to my previous post, I hope to wrap up posts about my January - June travels soon because I have a feeling that what little spare time I have now will soon be a distant memory. It's a welcome, long overdue change, however. Just think, now I have an excuse to shop to for new office supplies and tech goodies! Say hel-lo to a new MacBook Pro...!

I know. Even I'm sick of reading it.

2009-07-19T15:23:00.004-06:00

So far 2009, as far as blogging is concerned, has been flat out pathetic. In the past six months I've jumped on here a few times to share a link or two, but mostly I've only profered broken record excuses. I logged in today with the intent to blog (still have that intent) and ended up redesigning my site/header/template instead. Go figure. So I have that going for me, at least, a new look for my neglected blog. If you're in a third-party RSS reader, clickety click over to the original post and check out the new site.

Design distractions aside, it's my intention to blog the last six months of travel within the next six weeks. My consulting gig is wrapped and thus my insane travel schedule is wrapped. I'll still travel and attend conferences and such, but nothing like the volume of the past three years.

I never did finish posting about my California trip, but since that takes us back to December 2008, we'll just call it sixes. Since January I've been to:

Marietta/Atlanta, Georgia
Seattle, Washington
Seattle, Washington (again, two weeks later)
Phoenix/Scottsdale, Arizona
Oberlin/Elyria, Ohio
Alamosa/Trinidad, Colorado
Castine, Maine

I can't say I've processed the photos from all of these trips as thoroughly as I'd like to, but I have found a few favorites and shared them on my photography blog (madeleines written with light). I also can't let the incomplete photo edits hold me back from blogging, however. These posts will be quick and dirty, as blog should be but as mine rarely is, and they will (hopefully) be done before Labor Day.

Why the rush? Well...I'm finally starting grad school! New post...

Happy May Day

2009-05-01T17:26:00.003-06:00

Obama's facebook feed

2009-04-30T18:59:00.002-06:00

I. Seriously. Laughed. Until. I. Cried. Granted I am a huge nerd and major political junkie, but come on, this is good stuff.

Read the full faux feed on Slate.com

Here's a small sample of the hilarity:

RT @fourthirtyam: Blahblah. Just blog already. #housekeeping

2009-04-30T17:48:00.005-06:00

So back in February I blamed (in part) facebook and delicious for my shameful blog neglect. I created the "while surfing around label" to house posts inspired by random stuff I find online - stuff that usually ends up on facebook and delicious, but rarely makes it to this blog. Well, that was a great idea, but I'm still not finding (making?) the time to post my more interesting internet wanderings. I posted a link to my delicious account in the menu bar of this blog, but I'm under no illusion that everyone rushed over to RSS my delicious feed.

All of that aside, I'm here to present yet another excuse. I've fallen in love with twitter. Big time. Yup. Because it's not enough to manage multiple blogs in my personal and professional life, facebook, gmail, a photography hobby, delicious, work and stuff, and you know, like a social life or something. I've now decided to manage a presence in the tweetsphere.

Here's the thing though, remember when I was all bent out of shape about blogs obliterating the English language as we know it...and I got all uppity and annoying about the impure micro-format of blogs...blahblah? Well yeah, so here I am every day reading and writing in 140 tweet characters...and loving it. I follow 80 something people/organizations, and 80 something people/organizations follow me. As far as news and politics go, twitter has all but replaced my google reader.

Like a broken record, I'm about to say what I always say when I pop on here to rationalize my neglect: I still have every intention of blogging, so stay tuned. I'm finally figuring out my broken computer and will soon start posting photos on madeleines written with light, so stay tuned on that front as well.

In the meantime, do you tweet? I'd love to follow you around. You'll find me @fourthirtyam and a link to my twitter profile is now located in the menu bar of this blog.

Happy Earth Day!

2009-04-22T15:04:00.002-06:00

Click here. Seriously. You don't want to miss this. You're already wasting time on blogs, just click.

Michelle Obama pretty much rocks

2009-04-04T23:46:00.003-06:00

I'll admit it. I teared up. I did. I loved this article posted at Politico.com. I love Michelle Obama. I don't think we could ask for a better role model for our young girls and grown women alike.

I still pause every so often to relish the fact that we elected a black man named Barack Hussein Obama to be our President. Articles like this remind me to relish in the fact that we got a pretty sweet package deal.

Coolest. Thing. I've. Ever. Seen.

2009-04-03T09:28:00.001-06:00

Spontaneous. Happy. Dancing. Critical mass. Wonder. Community. Anti-convention. Public transit. YouTube/Web 2.0. Social experiment. Sound of Music + rap.

Enough said.

The Power of Pfieffer

2009-03-08T12:49:00.008-06:00

I need a break from work. As lame as it is, work bleeds right into the weekend these days and I can barely make a distinction between Wednesday or Saturday, 9:00am or 9:00pm, blah or blech. Today I didn't feel the need to indulge a vegging re-charge, I felt the need to indulge a creative re-charge. I decided to finally pay attention to my vacation photos from California, specifically the photos from the central coast. I've previously posted a few Orange County photos on this blog and a few more on my photography blog, but it felt good to spend concentrated time with my central coast memories. If you're interested, I posted nearly ten photos on madeleines written with light.

I'd always thought it was stunning and I'd spent all sorts of time up and down the cliffs, but in 2002 I fell irrevocably in love with California's central coast. A friend and I took a month off and wandered from Tijuana, Mexico to Marin County, north of San Francisco. Unless you've experienced it for yourself, there aren't really words for me to describe the power this coastline holds. It's rugged, it's wild, it's unforgiving, it's enormous, it's breathtaking, and somehow it manages to be delicately beautiful. The sea has a fierce quality in her interaction with these cliffs, a quality distinctly different from her gentle caressing of manicured OC beaches. There's just nothing like it.

Southern California beaches feel accessible. You can surf and swim and snorkel and splash. I grew up on those beaches and I love them, but the central coast seduces you with mystery. You're forced to enjoy the shoreline at a distance, a blindingly high distance atop rough cliffs. You experience a sense of scale that you just can't fathom when you're actually on the beach, wading around in the water. You see the shades of the tide change from one moment to the next. You see the incredible depth of the water, the crushing force of the waves, and you have a vague sense of an entire world you know nothing about.

Pfieffer Beach is painful in its perfection because it seamlessly blends these two paradigms. If you don't already know how to get there, you'll never find it. Though it's a state park maintained by green-clad rangers and all, it's virtually unmarked, it's access road is well-hidden amongst the dense Big Sur forest, and it's a magical secret as far as I'm concerned. You wind and wind and wind around the jutting cliff lines of Coast Highway, climbing higher and higher and higher until you make a sharp turn that takes you down down down steep one-lane switchbacks. Once you leave your car you continue to descend on foot, walking through tunnels of eery Dr. Seuss Trees (for the scientific name, google someone who cares)...

...until WHAM! You're hit with the most stunning vista you can imagine. After spending so much time on the high cliffs, only able to peer at the beach via massive telephoto lenses, Pfieffer Beach feels like a special moment frozen in time, a moment that you're somehow stealing from this coastline. The power of Pfieffer Beach lies in the pervasive sense that you're only allowed that brief moment; and even then, Nature is still very much in control. The tides are rough and immediately deep, not allowing even the most shallow wading. The rocks are giantic and the force of the crashing waves is staggering.

In miles and miles of coastline, it's one little cove, one little inlet that someone was audacious enough to access, one chance to step inside your massive telephoto lens and feel the mist on your face. Dangerous tides rise fast and high to fill this little cove and erase any remnant of us. But we had a moment. We attempted clumsy photographs. We later search inadeqately for words to fill a blog post. At the end of the day, however, Pfieffer is an experience that can only be lived.

I need another vacation.

Control vs. Empowerment

2009-02-21T23:49:00.005-07:00

A friend recently posted a fascinating article on his facebook page - "Media Morphosis: How the internet will devour, transform, or destroy your favorite medium." He made the point that old guard media companies are dying by the wayside and he questioned: "What will take their place?"

My abbreviated response went something like this:

Time will tell, and considering the exponentially rapid pace at which our media now develops, we won't have to wait long to find out. In my opinion, the signs of change point toward more democratic, accessible, user-generated media. I loved this article and I agree with most of it. What bugged me was the frequent assertion that commercially viable media is the only media worthy of attention and capable of evolution.

"...the rhetoric is mostly of the nonproductive "But I like it!" and "It's good for society!" variety, with not enough thought given to whether these media are commercially viable." Thumbs down. I don't think those arguments of value are nonproductive. Not in the least. I'm not going to launch a tirade against capitalism, but I will say that, commercially viable or not, I vote that democratic, accessible, user-generated media will win out.

My unabridged version includes this rambling thought:

I posted previously about the global shift we're in the midst of, a shift to a more accessible, egalitarian society. Along those lines, in specifically discussing the potential demise of big-budget studio movies, the article states: "The specific, rarefied animal that is the gigantic film spectacle demands a technological reality that has ceased to exist -- just enough technology to distribute the films everywhere, but not so much technology that the audience gets to overrule your distribution decisions."

In other words, it used to be the case that a big studio controlled how and where and when and what movies you watch. Sound familiar? It used to be the case that the news was on at 5:00pm, the prime-time line up started just after dinner, and if you wanted to see that week's episode of Sitcom X, you were sitting in front of the tv at that time. Now? This could not be further from the truth.

This micro example of how we access television programs can be extrapolated into a macro discussion of power shifting in every way possible. People are taking ownership of their world, their communities, their tv viewing... Think I'm crazy or think I'm spot on, but I see our shifting media consumption as a much larger paradigm shift in our collective conscience. A shift to understanding our ecological impact. A shift to taking back control from monopolistic companies. A shift to empowering people who have been systemically disenfranchised from media in the past. Power is no longer held by the privileged few. The media venues that figure that out - the politicians who figure that out, the companies that figure that out, etc. - will be the those that we're still talking about 10 years from now.

par⋅a⋅digm | serving as a pattern

2009-02-21T21:24:00.007-07:00

Recently a Sam Greenfield article appeared on Huffington Post: "Is That All You Have, Limbaugh?"

I don't remember the details of Limbaugh's tirade referenced in the article, and I don't actually care. What I do care about is the point Greenfield makes that the tired paradigm of fear and anger is on. its. way. out.

I've been feeling this shift coming for years now, and I am only one of millions of people who sense it. It's like we're hitting a giant reset button and changing our collective mind. Some people can instinctively hear, see, and even feel the difference between fear-based politics, fear-based advertising, fear-based motivation, a reactionary worldview...and the contrasting proactive, positive way of explaining the world. Some people cannot. Some people get defensive, some people get confused, some people get flat out angry. That's fine. If they can't make the distinction, that's fine. The shift is coming regardless.

The election of Barack Obama, particularly considering how he ran his groundbreaking community-based campaign, is one manifestation of this shift to a proactive worldview. Other manifestations include the near-failure of global capitalism, the fact that the internet is rapidly democratizing media, (more of my thoughts on media found here), people are beginning to care about how we treat our planet, and so much more. In other words - every day people, not exclusively those who have traditionally held power, are now empowered to define their own reality, make their own choices, create the world as they want it to be.

An article by Kari Henley - "Community is Our New Deal" - explains this shift. "...the winds of change are swinging away from fear and consumerism to regeneration and commonality. Our country has been asleep in a divisive rat race, and the time to cast away hedonism and embrace greater good for all is at hand. We are ready and yearning for it. Demonstrating the simplicity and power of community has been absent from our leaders for so long." (read more...) It's like taking the red pill and being ejected from the matrix. As soon as you identify the distinction between reactive and proactive worldviews, you see the chasm widening and there's no going back.

Thankfully.

Who needs porn when there are online trunk shows?

2009-02-21T20:59:00.005-07:00

Dear Fellow Lovers of Lovely Things,

Say "hello" to vintage sari throws, Argentine wool runners, Turkish hammam towels, Mexican bedspreads, hadenga cushions, suzanis, mohair throws, cowhides, hemp linen pillows, Ethiopian blankets, arabesque tea glasses, Turkish pendant lamp, michoacán platters, Moroccan poufs, Chilean ox horn spoons...

I need a moment to compose myself.

Laura Aviva curates a series of online trunk shows selling all things exotic and delicious for your home. Each show has a new theme. Right now, for instance, the theme is object and textile.

I click and scroll and surf and lust after these treasures...waiting for the day I have $800 lying around, just waiting to be exchanged for a new bedspread.

Think Global. Map Local.

2009-02-21T20:17:00.004-07:00

"...a participatory mapmaking platform that bridges the gap between awareness and action." Just when you thought Google Maps couldn't get any cooler, the community-minded programmers at Open Green Map created a wiki-style interface that let's you map resources relating to sustainability, nature, culture, etc. Think city parks, local businesses, non-profit and human services organizations, museums, etc.

Stuff like this really turns me on. By "stuff" I mean to say any venture related to organizing communities. There are immediate applications for Open Green Maps in my current job, but there are also implications for future plans I'm concocting. There's currently no map for Salt Lake City, let alone my hipster Sugarhouse neighborhood.

Hmmmmm...

I prefer the lights off

2009-02-20T22:07:00.002-07:00

From the Earth Hour website:

"Earth Hour 2009 is set to switch off the globe. Already 538 cities in 75 countries, which is double the number of countries that participated in 2008, are committed. With hundreds more cities expected to sign up to switch off in the coming months, Earth Hour 2009 is setting the platform for an unprecedented global mandate for action on climate change."

There is something really peaceful about stopping, stopping it all, for a full hour. Shut off the lights, computer, television, phone...

I'm in.

Dance Dance Science Revolution

2009-02-20T21:16:00.003-07:00

This. Is. Fantastic.

John Bohannon, writer for Science Magazine, had the genius idea to ask scientists to interpret their research as modern dance. He notes that there is "...no shortage of scientists willing to dance their research..." There is something so magical and charming about this.

Read this article if you're interested in the full story, but you should at least watch the video embedded in the article. The video has a great narration.

I so love the idea of dancing scientists.

Blame facebook & del.icio.us

2009-02-20T20:06:00.008-07:00

Yes, there is unrelenting stress at work. Yes, it's been a long, blah winter. Yadda yadda yadda...and then...

In part I blame my blogging negligence on facebook. In direct correlation to my discovery of "posted items" aka "links" on my facebook wall, my blogging frequency dropped pretty much off the radar.

Then I discovered del.icio.us and it rocked my world. I've figured out how to link my del.icio.us bookmarks to this blog (see the sidebar menu), but that is a poor, poor excuse for blogging.

I want to blog. I really do. I want to ramble on with unsolicited opinions and post editorial tid bits about all the random stuff I'm reading, seeing, doing, hearing, et.al. I'm quite certain that some geek out there in cyberland has created an interface that would let me bookmark on del.icio.us, spam my facebook wall, and post to this blog all from one central program. If anyone knows of such a platform, please let me know.

In the meantime, I need to be better about posting. I need to be better about pulling particularly interested tid bits onto this site and, as I said, rambling on and editorializing. Most of these posts will end up in the new "while surfing around" label.

What is it that they say about good intentions?

...the crowd went wild!!

2009-02-20T19:55:00.004-07:00

Go on. Create your own band and debut album. You know you want to. I loved it so much I created two.

(1) Go to: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random

The title of the first Wikipedia article that shows up is the name of your new band.

(2) Go to: http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3

The last 3-5 words of the last quote on the page is the title of your debut album.

(3) Go to: http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days

The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

(4) Use whatever editing program you prefer and put it all together to make your album cover.

slowly but surely

2009-02-03T22:09:00.002-07:00

Dear Internet,

I'm slowly starting to get back into my creative groove. I've processed a few more vacation photos and posted my favorites on madeleines written with light.

Love,

me

RESET.

2009-02-02T21:12:00.008-07:00

I know. I know. I haven't been paying enough attention to you and you're ready to break up with me. I didn't post any sort of momentous goal-setting, new-leaf-turning, happy-2009-themed post. The inauguration I've been waiting and working eight years for came and went withOUT a slew of ecstatic rambles. I have 1,500+ photos waiting to be processed from both my California vacay and my recent trip to Atlanta. My iBook has crashed with a full hard drive and, despite my attempts at off-loading to an external drive, I've yet to own the reality of needing an entirely new laptop (that...ahem...I can't exactly afford).

Folks, I'm in a creative funk. I haven't even begun to process my photos because the whole system runs at an annoying snails pace, what with it being overly full and all. I've really missed it. I've sincerely missed tinkering with my pics and chatting with the internets. Is my lack of blogging causing this funk or is this funk causing my lack of blogging. What the hell ever. The point is that I finally broke down tonight and braved the uncooperative computer. I only managed to crank out a few edits before I felt it necessary to wax poetic on circadian rhythms......

I am not a morning person. It's just not my thing. I have incredible respect for people who beat the sun in a race toward our day, but I'm more likely to be the night owl wide awake at 3:30am. I have, at various points throughout my life, tried with conscious intention to become a morning person. I really do turn on to the idea of having my own secret space before the chaotic world whirs to life around me...but I assure you that I turn off as soon as my alarm blares.

All of that to say, I know I've truly checked into a vacation when my circadian rhythm resets. I know I've truly checked in when I am up every morning with (or before) the sun, feeling fine, plenty of energy, happy to be there, even feeling creative as I snap hundreds of photographs of this that and the other thing. It takes a while for my stressed out system to reset, but once it does, it's magic. I think that's of the most beautiful concepts in the whole world: our inherent circadian rhythm (and not just because I hear Michael Stipes soothing voice singing every time I feel the phrase roll off my tongue). The academic in me cringes at the thought of citing Wiki, but I'm about to cite Wiki nonetheless. Should you not enjoy my description of the circadian phenomenon, read more here.

Circadian rhythm, very simply, refers to the sleep-wake cycle that all life forms complete in roughly 24 hours. Have you seen flowers that open and close, leaves that turn in on themselves then fan wide open, tides that ebb and flow like clockwork, animals that sleep and wake with only the cues of the moon and sun...? Then you get the idea. Many humans, though certainly not all, have managed to screw up our most basic, instinctual rhythm with unnatural light, stress, bad habits, etc. We medicate, we try yoga, we join three different gyms, we journal, we pay therapists to listen to our angst...and guess what? All we really need is the sincere chance to reset.

Reset. Not rewind. Not pause. Full. Complete. Total. Reset. The level of stress with which I enter a vacation dictates how long it will take my system to reset, but I do always manage to reset (usually just in time to go home and screw it up again...). My most vivid memory of this powerful shift in rhythm was in Kaua'i with my girlfriends. I have never felt that grounded in my entire life and I have never felt that grounded since. We woke up when the sun came up. It didn't matter what time it was. We went to bed when the sun went down. It didn't matter what time it was. We floated about in the ocean all day and, particularly for women (don't get me started), there is no force on earth with greater healing power than the tides. I very nearly approached this same nirvana during my recent California vacation. By the last half of my trip, I felt the sun rise over and over and over. It was magical. It was healing. It was exactly what I needed. It's now a distant memory and I would give anything to find it again.

that she might have a story of herself

2009-01-11T11:08:00.004-07:00

Nearly a year and a half ago I posted this Jennifer Michael Hecht poem. I'm now listening to Speaking of Faith on NPR and the guest is none other than Hecht. In a kind, responsive nudge from The Universe, I'm grateful to be in the right place at the right time today. I needed this.

even eve
the only soul in all of time
to never have to wait for love
must have leaned some sleepless nights
alone against the garden wall
and wailed
cold, stupefied, and wild
and wished to trade in all of eden
to have but been a child

in fact, i gather that is why she leapt
and fell from grace
that she might have a story of herself
to tell in some other place

("History" Jennifer Michael Hecht)

Penpals are hip (again)

2009-01-05T18:40:00.006-07:00

Do you remember penpals? I associate them with elementary school and some boy living in Greece who chose to regale me with details of life in his village. Though my memories are fond, I'm fairly certain this Greek child was actually my 4th grade teacher. Seriously. I think Mrs. Hendrickson forged, with loving intent, the handful of postcards I received from my special penpal. To this day, in my mind's eye, I can see her stuffing fake letters into my cubby hole on the top shelf, right next to the backpack rack and unruly pile of red rubber four square balls.

Well guess what? Penpals are back and tres hip this time around. If you haven't been introduced already, Dear Reader, meet Postcrossing. You create a free profile, request addresses from all over Planet Earth, and send away. You can send postcards that you purchase at the corner drug store, or within the Postcrossing site you can create cards from your own photographs (which they will print and mail for you!).

As you send postcards, you receive postcards...the more you send, the more you receive. Fair enough. I've only just started the process, but my first two postcards were received today. It's already quite addicting.

So once you set up your free profile, you log into the site and register both the postcards you receive and those that you send. The site gives you postcard id codes for each piece of mail so that you can watch your Google map fill in with your comings and goings. You can also send email-style messages to your new penpal friends through the Postcrossing site. JaDD in Finland just got my card this morning. See...

Check it out.

Juggling two blogs

2009-01-04T14:23:00.005-07:00

It's only been a few weeks since I started my second blog. I'm learning how to use my new Nikon D80 and madeleines written with light is the space I created to hold my favorite photographs that come from that exploration. I've already run into the dilemma (not a conundrum on par with world hunger, granted) of the interplay of these two blogs.

I want the photography blog to be just that, all about photography. I don't want to editorialize or clutter the photo posts with chatter. I want the images to stand alone. If people like them, they like them. If they identify with them, they identify with them. If they don't dig it, that's cool.

I want this blog, my madeleines, to remain the editorial space, as it were. It was originally created as an outlet for me to write and I want it to stay that way. What I've already noticed, however, is that some of my photos will appear on both sites. That may be repetitive for readers who follows both blogs, but again, this dilemma in perspective is mundane at best.

Unfortunately my vacation is over and I'm back at work this week...meaning that blog updates are once again at the mercy of rare free time. I still need to post about New Orleans, I have all sorts of photos from my recent trip to California, and my Flickr hasn't been updated since July 2008 (!!)......so I'll see you when I see you.

California Dreamin'

2009-01-03T22:24:00.003-07:00

I had big plans for my California vacation, not the least of which being catching up on my blogs. Not so much. Turns out I took over 1,000 photos...but didn't post a single entry on either blog. Nor did I keep up with facebook, didn't log into gmail even once, and I certainly didn't touch my work account. It was fabulous, but now I'm feeling behind. Cest la vie.

This bird of paradise flower says it all. It was warm. It was sunny. I spent every day on the ocean. I had perfect light for those 1,000+ photos and eventually you'll see them either here or here or both. Stay tuned.

peace. shalom. salam.

2008-12-22T22:59:00.003-07:00

I gave this ornament to my mom last year and it's still my favorite on the entire tree. It's handmade of capiz shell from the Philippines...and the best part is that it's fair trade.

Decorative Details

2008-12-22T22:55:00.002-07:00

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

2008-12-22T22:51:00.001-07:00

Riley, aka The Sweetest Dog in the World

2008-12-22T22:02:00.004-07:00

I've gushed about my parent's adorably perfect dog before - namely here and here - but I'm spending time with her this week and gushing all over again. I love my parents and all, there's good people or whatever, but Riley is honestly the best part about coming home.

Home for the Holidays

2008-12-22T21:10:00.004-07:00

Ah yes...the uncomfortable twin bed, five inches off the end of which my feet dangle each night. Welcome home, kido. Over the many years since I left it behind, my old high school bedroom has transformed itself innumerable times (a place to stuff random junk, sewing room despite the fact that no one in my family sews, a brief stint with renters, second office when my parents decided they each needed their own space, and so on). The latest iteration is apparently two twin beds with patchwork quilts, a shabby chic nightstand, and intentionally-torn wallpaper made to look like red bricks. This little backwoods boudoir is home sweet home for a week. I may not have a bed that allows all my extremities to be supported at the same time, but at least I have my own bathroom.

I leave this weekend for a vacation in California. I'll spend time with my family in Orange County, but I'm also planning on a couple days in the central coast, San Luis Obispo area. In the meantime I hope to spend time blogging, finish reading my latest book (Letters from a Woman Homesteader), catch up on stacks of neglected magazines, watch endless hours of "What Not To Wear" on TLC, and teach myself how to use my new Nikon D80. Beats the office!

45 words that changed our world

2008-12-22T16:00:00.007-07:00

The Newseum, under construction for what felt like an eternity, was finally open when I was in DC this fall. I'm a voracious news junkie and could have easily spent all day in this innovative museum dedicated to all-things news. As it was, I spent about 4 hours and still wanted more. I won't go so far as to say it changed my life, but it came close. The highlights according to me:

Berlin Wall Gallery. Eight sections of the infamous 12-foot wall are on display in the Newseum. I know the stories, I've seen the movies, I have memories of what my history book told me, and most importantly I vividly remember that our cultural ambassadors known as The New Kids on the Block played an instrumental role in its demise; but it wasn't until I saw the wall with my own eyes and touched it with my own hands (don't tell the docent) that I really got it. I was awe struck by the power of the images. As the placard stated so well, "The Berlin Wall was strong enough to stop a tank, but it couldn't stop news from getting into East Germany by word of mouth, smuggled messages or radio and television." That is such an incredible statement of the power of people acting successfully against systems of oppression. I love it.

News History Gallery. If I were to get lost in the Newseum for days on end, you could probably find me combing the front pages of history. This exhibit was mind blowing in scale. You pull out drawer after preserved drawer of famous front pages from around the world, all discussing the most significant moments in human history. I stood for no less than five minutes staring at the Wonder Woman Ms. cover. How lucky are we to have these resource available to us in such an extensive, beautiful archive?

9-11 Gallery. It's difficult to describe the thoughts that flood your mind, staring up at a three-storey wall of newspapers dated the day after the attacks on the pentagon and World Trade Center. Newspapers in every possible language shared our shock and our horror. The world cried with us and stood with us as we tried to make sense of what happened. Within our own borders we were united in a way we hadn't experienced in a generation, certainly never in my lifetime. We had such an opportunity to harness that energy. We had an opportunity to begin a long-overdue dialgoue. We had an opportunity to collaborate in ways we've never thought possible. Instead, our illustrious administration told us to shop. We turned on mind-numbing "reality" television, our dissenting voices were silenced, our civil liberties quietly abolished. We took what could have been a profound turning point toward a more peaceful world and created one catastrophic clusterf**k after another. It's difficult to go back to 9-12-2001 and realize what we squandered.

45 Words of Freedom. "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances." 45 words. The First Amendment in our Bill of Rights. 45 words that drastically changed the world as we know it. Nowhere is the democratic experiment as robust as in the United States and I would argue that the freedom of religion, speech, press, assembly, and petition is the very backbone of that experiment. This gallery in the Newseum puts "each of the five freedoms in historical context and [provides] perspective on what they mean to us more than 200 years later." There is a documentary highlighting each of these five freedoms, stuffed full of historical footage and stirring narration; but it's not for sale. Not even in the gift shop. Don't bother asking. Believe me, I tried.

An Icon

2008-12-21T21:41:00.003-07:00

I know that Holden lived in Manhattan, but each time I read and re-read his snarky tale I picture him running away and camping out under this elephant's watchful eye. I have to agree with Mr. Caulfield, natural history museums are scary and fascinating. I love them.

National Museum of the American Indian | Washington, D.C.

2008-12-21T19:28:00.006-07:00

During my recent trip to DC I finally made it to the American Indian museum. I'd always been fascinated by the architecture, but passed up a visit on previous trips. I'm glad I made time to experience it on this last trip. More than the exhibits themselves - which are okay, but not fabulous - I enjoyed learning about the way in which they built the museum, collected the exhibits, and grouped everything thematically.

There are no right angles, every room flows seamlessly into the next, and the foyer is one of the most stunning of any Smithsonian. Every tribe represented in the museum contributed the artifacts for their specific exhibit, and every tribe named a co-curator to work with Smithsonian staff. What a fantastic collaboration.

Something that stood out to me is that every tribe has an exhibit explaining their creation legend. I like the way the website explains it: "...Native cosmology — the worldviews and philosophies related to the creation and order of the universe — and the spiritual relationship between mankind and the natural world." To be completely honest, so many tribes are represented and while the displays are beautiful they are really text-heavy. Trying to take in all the information is impossible in the time I had, so I got the basic idea and read in detail the legends of only a few tribes.

I've spent more than my fair share of time in museum cafes on both sides of the Atlantic and I can say without a doubt that the Mitsitam Cafe is by far the most interesting and creative. They group the cuisine by region and then serve traditional dishes of the tribes that live in that region (all from the Western hemisphere; including the Northern Woodlands, South America, the Northwest Coast, Meso America, and the Great Plains). It's such a great idea, I loved it.

The most striking exhibit is one discussing the arrival of the Europeans. You leave a room filled with gold and art and relics of thriving, wealthy, self-sufficient tribes...and you turn the corner to walk down a hallway filled with bibles and guns. I think the display speaks for itself. I'm glad they didn't skirt around this issue and I'm glad it makes people uncomfortable. It should.

pho·tog·ra·phy

2008-12-21T01:57:00.005-07:00

The art of producing images by the action of radiant energy, especially light, on a sensitive surface.

The etymology of photography traces to Greek roots: phot- meaning light and graphos- meaning writing.

The art of radiant energy. Writing with light. How lyrical is that? It's no wonder I'm in love with photography. So in love in fact that I've started a second blog to showcase the products of my hobby.

I know, I know, I don't pay enough attention to this blog as it is. I blame facebook for my blog neglect (explanatory post coming soon), but that's beside the point. I post my photos all over this blog and I still intend to do so, but this new blog will be exclusively a photo blog. I recently acquired my first digital SLR, a Nikon D80. I'm excited to take my hobby to the next level - and - just as this blog has strengthened my writing, I anticipate my photo blog will strengthen my photographic skills.

Reader, I'd like to introduce you to madeleines written with light. madeleines written with light, meet Reader.

Emotional Vomit.

2008-12-17T20:20:00.008-07:00

So that apparently needed to happen. Turns out that with a few days hindsight, that was analogous to the satisfying moment when you suspect you might be sick...and then you finally throw up...and then you start feeling better. Not a graceful image, but entirely accurate.

So that closure I thought I'd achieved? Not so much. Awesome.

The good news? Naming it is half the battle. I traveled so far down that long road of closure that I think I just got tired. I needed to pull off and take a nap. I needed to get out, stretch my legs, buy another Gatorade. The problem is I never got back in the car. I realize that now. All this time that I thought I was making progress, I was just idling in a roadside rest stop somewhere between him and home.

To carry this cheesy analogy further than it needs to be carried: I'm back in the driver's seat. There are only a few more corners to turn before I'm in the home stretch. You know that point in the trip? Your back is sore, your licorice is long gone, the iPod shuffling is getting old, you just want to sleep in your own bed...but the landmarks are familiar so you know you're close. There's nothing more satisfying than returning home after a long road trip. Though long-time-coming emotional vomit does run a close second.

I can still smell the red leather...

2008-12-14T12:53:00.007-07:00

...and handmade paper. I carried it with me everywhere. I wrote and doodled and wrote some more, cut and pasted and collaged, spilled the secrets both meaningful and mundane. I gave myself infinite permission to live in a candid space, a raw space unlike anything I'd ever experienced before. Or since. I knew when he gave it to me that it was never mine to keep. And while I knew that each page was his, I still let myself relish the poetry that each page also belonged intimately to me. I didn't know what he would choose to do with those pages, but I held a vaguely naive trust that he would take care of them. I still wonder where they ended up. I wonder even today.

It's the pillow talk that haunts me. Of course I remember our laughs, those unexpected moments assigned distinctly to the early days when there were still surprises to learn. I remember our coy flirtations, the sexy entendres spread wide like peacock feathers. I remember the overtly intellectualized conversations and debates about the day's news. I remember all of that in the purely rational space of my head. Those memories take the fuzzy shape of thoughts not quite formed, not quite able to effect me. Yet the memories of our pillow talk effect me beyond my control. I can still feel those conversations in my chest. To this day my knees get weak as my pulse races and I hear his whispers like they were yesterday. It's the pillow talk that haunts me. We wove such colorful dreams.

Our time together was cinematic, musical. Within the catalogue of songs I searched to articulate my muddled mind, nothing felt more appropriate than Rachael Yamagata's Reason Why. Her words are as relevant to our situation as if I had penned them with my own shaky hand, and yet it's the absurd irony that catches in my throat. "You and I know the reason why..." If I knew the reason why, I would no longer feel his beautiful promises aching in my chest, so real to me that I know I could reach in and grab hold of them. If I knew the reason why, I would simply file him away in the plentiful drawer of live-and-learn. I've put him in that drawer many times before, but he always manages to sneak out. I'm done. I've grown weary of trying to contain those memories in a space that they clearly don't belong. Not yet anyway.

I'm sure he's done his best, as I have, to cover the tracks that we left. Even after all is said and done and said again, I do wish him well and hope he's found whatever it was he was looking for. I hope it was worth it.

Reason Why
Rachael Yamagata

I think about how it might have been
We'd spend our days travelin'
It's not that I don't understand you
It's not that I don't want to be with you
But you only wanted me
The way you wanted me

So, I will head out alone and hope for the best
And we can hang our heads down as we skip the goodbyes
You can tell the world what you want them to hear
I've got nothing left to lose, my dear
So, I'm up for the little white lies
But you and I know the reason why
I'm gone, and you're still there

I'll buy a magazine searching for your face
From coast to coast, or wherever I find my place
I'll track you on the radio
And I'll sign your list in a different name
But as close as I get to you
It's not the same

So, I will head out alone and hope for the best
We can pat ourselves on the back and say that we tried
And if one of us makes it big
We can spill our regrets
And talk about how the love never dies
But you and I know the reason why
I'm gone, and you're still there

So, steal the show
And do your best to cover the tracks that I have left
I wish you well and hope you find whatever you're looking for
The way I might've changed my mind
But you only showed me the door

So, I will head out alone and hope for the best
We can pat ourselves on the back and say that we tried
And if one of us makes it big
We can spill our regrets
And talk about how the love never dies
But you and I know the reason why

Soundtrack for the Snow

2008-12-13T13:54:00.002-07:00

At the 1:43 mark my heart breaks into a million little pieces. It hurts so good. How can I not melt into these words? "...you kissed my lips with my mouth so full of questions..."

hello cupcake

2008-12-05T19:16:00.006-07:00

Jen and I stumbled into hello cupcake in Dupont Circle (more than once) ... and it was delicious.

My friends who work in Dupont Circle told me that their office has an ongoing cupcake competition: who has the best frosting, best cake, ideal frosting to cake ratio, price per bite, etc. We discussed a cupcake crawl, but never got around to it.

What ever did trendy yuppies do before gourmet cupcakes? Oh right, we all ate organic acai frozen yogurt.

Because I'm 32 flavors and then some

2008-12-05T14:57:00.008-07:00

I'm in a deliriously random musical mood today. I might thank copious amounts of DayQuil, NyQuil, and a litany of other miscellaneous Quils I've been employing to destroy a nasty bug. I might also cite the fact that I've been quarantined in my apartment for 40+ hours now and let's be honest, I'm going a little nuts. I telecommuted yesterday and actually did quite a bit of work from home. Today? I did quite a bit of work tooling around my iTunes library.

Because It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time:

1. The Way We Get By | Spoon
2. You Ain't Goin' Nowhere | Glen Hansen & Marketa Irglova
3. Shake It | Metro Station
4. I Will Follow You Into the Dark | Death Cab for Cutie
5. Neighborhood #1 | Arcade fire
6. Paralyzer | Finger Eleven
7. Whole Wide World | Wreckless Eric
8. Librarian | My Morning Jacket
9. Did You See the Words? | Animal Collective
10. Shut Up and Let Me Go | The Ting Tings
11. Check Yes Juliet | We the Kings
12. Gobbledigook | Sigur Ros
13. Spiraling | Keane
14. The Garden | Mirah
15. Un Simple Histoire | Thievery Corporation
16. Something Special | Big Bang
17. All I Want is You | Barry Louis Polisar
18. I Kissed a Girl | Katy Perry
19. Technologic | Daft Punk
20. Laid | James
21. Hands in the Air | Girl Talk*
22. Where Do You Go To? | Peter Sarstedt
23. Sleeping In | The Postal Service
24. Casimir Pulaski Day | Sufjan Stevens
25. Disturbia | Rihanna
26. Second Chance | Liam Finn
27. Float On | Modest Mouse
28. Whistle for the Choir | The Fratellis
29. 1234 | Feist
30. Cape Canaveral | Conor Oberst
31. Taste | Lorna Vallings
32. We Shall Overcome | Gustav

* My friend Kris loves mashups and dj musak, so when I visited her in North Carolina this fall I was treated to all sorts of messy music. I forgot how much I love the random brilliance of mashups...when done right. Girl Talk does it right. Oh so right. He releases his stuff on the Illegal Art label and you can choose to pay for it, or not (a trendy paradigm familiar to Radiohead fans). I've been obsessing about his latest album, "Feed the Animals." To give you a sense of the chaos that is Girl Talk, here's one mix I'm partial to:

"In Step"

0:00 Roy Orbison - "You Got It"
0:00 Drama - "Left Right Left"
0:00 Jermaine Stewart - "We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off"
0:30 Arts & Crafts - "What a Feeling" (which samples Ralph MacDonald - "Jam on the Groove")
0:47 Salt-N-Pepa - "Push It"
0:57 Deee-Lite - "Groove Is in the Heart" (which samples "Get Up" by Vernon Burch)
1:02 Nirvana - "Lithium"
1:15 Thurston Moore - "See-Through Play/Mate"
1:38 The Gap Band - "You Dropped a Bomb on Me"
1:43 Fergie ft. Ludacris - "Glamorous"
1:44 Michael Jackson - "P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)"
1:45 Earth, Wind & Fire - "September"
1:53 INXS - "Need You Tonight"
2:00 Kraftwerk - "Tour de France"
2:51 Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine - "1-2-3"
2:53 Diddy ft.Keyshia Cole - "Last Night"
2:53 The Beach Boys - "God Only Knows"
3:16 Snoop Dogg - "Sexual Eruption"
3:21 Bizarre Inc. - "I'm Gonna Get You"

Need to hear it to believe it? Go for it...

Want more? Clickityclick you know you do...

co co sala

2008-12-05T11:12:00.004-07:00

I had a total Sex in the City moment on this last trip to DC. I had one of those chic urban moments that makes me pause, look around, shake my head and mutter, "Is this my life? Sweet." Sweet indeed. Sweet like cocoa. Or rather sweet like co co sala chocolate lounge.

Reservations required for boutique charm, an abundance of artisanal chocolates, ultra modern decor with soft candlelight caressing your organic sliders, and dropping $30 for desert, ah yes...the city life.

It took me all of 2.5 seconds to glance over the menu and make my decision: Chocolate Connoisseur Tasting.

I was served five gradients of chocolate ranging from white to 78% cocoa. I was even given a little key/map thing to guide me through my plate (ie: 30% Milk Chocolate from Guatemala). Each grade of chocolate came in solid, semi-solid, and liquid form. Dude. Seriously. After consulting with my friends, the strategy was as follows: I took one grade at a time, ate one solid piece, then half the semi-solid piece, and knocked back the shot. I can't really describe the sensation of warm melted chocolate coating my throat and sliding to it's new home in my happy tummy. My goodness.

If you want to see great photos...scroll through this page and salivate. It was really difficult to capture the ambiance because it was so dimly lit. Their website is pretty fabulous though, amazing photos, so check it out.

I'm serious. It's a shoe car.

2008-12-04T22:34:00.003-07:00

The fact that there is a red sex-me heel driving down a busy DC street is funny. The fact that this particular red sex-me heel stalled mid-way through the intersection and the full-helmeted beefcake driver had to hop out and push said heel, even soliciting help from the frustrated drivers honking angrily behind him, is extra funny. Who drives a shoe? Honestly?

Vegetarian Feast

2008-12-04T22:23:00.002-07:00

...because who doesn't go to DC to eat, eat, eat?!

Busboys & Poets | Viva la Revolucion

2008-12-04T21:39:00.004-07:00

Many scholars trace the coffeehouse phenomenon to the Beats of the 1950s (the decade and movement about which I happened to write my thesis, re: the existential impact of the Cold War on the newly-formed demographic of the American teenager), but that is too ethnocentric a view. All over the world, for centuries, coffee/tea house, as well as independent book sellers, have served as a hub of progressive dialogue and gathering places for citizens hungry to begin social movements (google it). I make it a point when I travel to seek out locally-owned coffee shops and/or book sellers. Some people collect key chains, I collect books and sweet smelling memories of cocoa and scones.

The history of Busboys and Poets (named in honor of the revolutionary Langston Hughes) is quite interesting, and also indicative of how so many local coffee shops establish cache in their community. Teaching for Change runs the bookstore and so this outing was a bit like a professional hajj for me. That's what I do all day every day, it's the basic catalogue of my office library, and if I could curl up in this bookstore forever and ever...I would. If you're interested in the background, click here and read on.

Random DC Surprise | Cathedral of the Something Something

2008-12-04T21:28:00.004-07:00

This is why I wander. I would never have seen this cathedral had I stayed on the mall and in the museums. I've been to DC enough times that the mall is kind of tired and so I intentionally set out to see sights I know I've never seen before. I didn't expect to run into this cathedral in Adams Morgan-ish, but it was a lovely surprise.

Did I read the historical marker? Of course. Do I remember that this cathedral was the first something something or oldest whatever you call it? No. That's not the point. I would typically jott thorough travel notes in a journal and savor the details; but this time around, I guess I savored the experience as a whole.