Join me on my new site...as I launch my new business!

I have very exciting news to share with you. 

I officially graduated from Blogger and have fully redesigned a site on Squarespace. Same URL: www.aseriesofadventures.com, but a whole new world! I'm using MailChimp to manage a newsletter for readers...so please head to the site and sign up. I want to stay in touch. Big changes are coming. Big.

The most exciting news is that I've teamed up with Danielle LaPorte to bring one of the first-ever Desire Map experiences to Salt Lake City, Utah. I'm designing in-person workshops and overnight retreats, as well as building an eCourse soon to be open to anyone and everyone!

If you've read this blog for any length of time, you know how transformative The Desire Map has been in my life. I'm on a mission to help others discover their own Core Desired Feelings and live their most adventurous life. This is going to be epic. Join me on the new site, get on the newsletter, and stay tuned!

Love,
me

Living the Dream: Holland America Press Trip to the Mediterranean

Regular readers will remember that in May I traveled to Alaska on assignment for The Avid Cruiser. I sailed the breathtaking Inside Passage courtesy of Princess Cruises. Through daily articles posted on the Live Voyage Report website, I was able to take for a test drive my life's dream of being a travel writer + photographer. Predictably, I was hooked. It was difficult work, late nights, early mornings, and not at all a leisurely cruising experience. I told Ralph (aka the avid cruiser himself) I would not only do it again, I would do it every day for the rest of my life. He was impressed with my work and invited me to join The Avid Cruiser team with an open invitation to future Live Voyage Report opportunities. Coolest job interview ever? Nailed it.

The view from this office cannot be beat.

Well...I have exciting news! My next opportunity to contribute a Live Voyage Report is as a member of a nine-person press corps sailing the Mediterranean with Holland America in October. It felt surreal enough writing from Alaska and realizing...dude, I'm like living my dream right now. So the sensation coursing through my body as the Holland America PR office continues to refer to me as a journalist...is nothing short of euphoric. Hell yes. Journalist. Me. Travel writer. Good at it. Doing it. Done.

It reminded me of a lesson I learned in preparing for Alaska: You are because you say you are. Jen Sincero makes a brilliant point in her book You Are a Badass. I'm paraphrasing, but she basically says: You want to be a photographer...but you don't take pictures. What sense does that make? Conversely, you take a lot of photos and it's a significant passion for you, but you say you're not a photographer? Why the hell not? What's a photographer then? Someone who takes pictures. So go do that. Say you're a photographer. Aren't you? Then go do it some more. You are whatever you say you are simply because you said it...then did something about it. 

Dear Universe, I am a journalist. I am a traveling storyteller who makes beautiful photographs and will share all of that badassery with all of you in just a couple weeks. I'm rocking an international data plan on my iPhone, so feel free to follow along in real time on Instagram and Twitter, and be sure to read the daily Live Voyage Reports.

However, before I jet off to Italy, Spain, France, and Tunisia, I'm going to New Orleans. Next week I'll visit my brother who's made a home in The Big Easy. Same situation with realtime goodies posted to Instagram and Twitter. I also hope to post about the New Orleans trip on this site while I'm there. Stay tuned!

Love and living the dream,
me

A word on clarity, declarations, and the power of your voice (part one)

I've been in a declarative mood as of late. Perhaps it was the sun in Leo's lion providing vicarious courage. Perhaps it's Mars in Scorpio, forcing a warrior spirit to wrestle everything into the light. Perhaps it's the culmination of years of quiet dreaming finally overflowing its threshold. Perhaps I'm now crystal clear about how I do and do not want to spend my life. Most likely it's all of the above in a perfect storm. Declaring to myself and others that I plan to eventually quit my job and travel the world is scary and exhilarating. It's also a game changer, the declaration alone. I've learned a few things, deep deep down in my bones learned, since making that declaration. Namely:

Declare. Do the hard work that clarity requires...then declare the shit out of your dreams. 

Danielle LaPorte is my spirit animal. The Desire Map is without a doubt the most radical paradigm shift I've ever experienced. I was raised in an organized religion, left of my own accord in my early twenties, spent a decade rebuilding a worldview on my own terms; and yet not even that paradigm shift compares to The Desire Map blowing my world wide open.

Every creation the world has ever known, from a lightbulb to wheels to the Mona Lisa, began with a desire of some kind. Likewise, everything you want to create in your life begins with a desire. Every desire must be defined and clarified and refined and seared into a new way of life, a daily practice. It's not casual wanting, or listless hoping that some day something will happen. It's active. This desire is a living thing. It defines you as you're defining it. You're co-creating with The Universe. Woah. Dude, I know.

The reason you need to be crystal clear about your desires is because...

The Universe not only pays attention to your desires, she wants all of it for you as much as you want it for yourself. Probably more. 

I wrote about the energy that shifted the moment I declared that I plan to eventually quit my job and travel the world. What I mean by "shifting energy" is that since making that declaration, it's all I can do to simply keep up with The Universe. She was waiting. Patiently. For years. She knew this was coming. She hoped I'd get here. She hoped I'd be courageous enough to realize admit this is what I want need. By the time I did finally catch up and own the full declaration of it all, she came flooding in. I can actually hear her sigh of relief, "Yes...this. It's so time for this. You have no idea the degree of awesomeness that's about to overtake every inch of your life." She's so stoked that I'm dialed in to the possibilities she sees for me. What does that flood look like? Opportunities to travel*, resources to learn and grow and keep my vibration high**, a serious medical diagnosis that's a terrifying blessing in disguise***, abundant support from strangers as well as friends, financial avenues that three weeks ago I didn't know even existed, and the deep satisfaction of knowing that I nailed it. I'm aligned. I'm in the zone. There's no going back now. Had I not been crystal clear with my desires, I could have and would have pursued any number of paths that might be fine, but not this right.

I'll be back soon with part two of this post, re: the correlation between my diagnosis and the power of our voice. I'll bring a lot of love (both gentle and tough) and permission with me. Stay tuned. Until then, wise words from author and civil rights leader Howard Thurman:

Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.

Love and desire,
me


* Exciting news about the next step in my travel writing career coming soon. 
** I'll share these resources in a separate post coming soon.
*** I'll practice what I preach and speak with courage about my diagnosis in part two of this post.

RTW Adventure. Yes, I said it.

It's time. I've flirted with this long enough. Anyone who has known me longer than three minutes knows my life's passion is travel. I'm at my best when I'm in motion. I'm also passionate about writing, photography, and building communities. As Danielle LaPorte declares, it's time for me to:

Push. Turn up the volume. Go hard. Go harder. Re-prioritize your aches and pains. Infuse your sensitivities with courage. Tell fear to fuck right the fuck off. Devote to Done. Decide to be one of those people who pull it off.

What am I going to pull off? An around-the-world adventure (RTW in internet speak). I've talked about long-term travel for years, but not until very recently have I really let it sink really deep down in my soul, letting it rest in the place where I really know I really need to pull it off. Not even just want to pull it off at this point, because we're passed that. Need to pull it off. Full on need. There was a distinct moment when it all shifted. A moment when I realized that the fear of not doing something, the fear of regret, overpowered the fear of doing that thing. This is that moment. A RTW adventure is that thing. Writing and photographing and inspiring other people to take the leap is also a part of it. 

Up to now I've said this out loud to only a few kindred souls. The most common, well-intentioned question: What about money and your career? My answer is two fold: 1) I'm saving my pennies and becoming BFFs with an abundant universe; and 2) Institutions of higher education will be here when I get back. My resume will be here when I get back. In fact, speaking of my career in higher ed, I'm framing this adventure as a sabbatical. Granted it's a sabbatical that I fund entirely on my own and must quit my job to pull off; but that only means I have ultimate freedom over my time and the terms of my travel.

The wish list below is 100% fluid and ever-changing (click for the permanent page link that houses the dynamic list). The point is that there is power in the declaration itself. There is power in being transparent with myself, The Universe, anyone who reads this. The list is messy and unedited. It contradicts and repeats itself. It's a creative flow of energy and it's what I need to keep my momentum going. It will change and change some more and eventually, over time, it will narrow down into plane tickets and Airbnb reservations. As of right now, this is what I dream of most:

Location-based Adventures

I should just type one word and be done: Everywhere. There is no end to this particular list. I must say though, I was overwhelmed with gratitude as I realized all the places I've already been. This list is a continuation of those travels and full of (mostly) brand new adventures I've yet to experience. I realize not all of my bucket list adventures are in my location-based adventures list and vice versa. It's a game of free association and categorizing uncategorizable things. Just go with it. 

Visit every continent

Swim in every ocean

Stand at the North Pole

Stand at the South Pole

A National Geographic Expedition

Scandinavia (especially a family history pilgrimage based on my Danish and Swedish research)

Live in Copenhagen for whatever period of time feels like living and not visiting

Iceland 

Ireland

Japan

Morocco

Spain

Cuba

Canadian Rockies
Australia + New Zealand 

Easter Island - really so many islands in Melanesia, Micronesia, and Polynesia

India 

Bhutan

Nepal

Tibet
Croatia

Turkey

Greece

Patagonia

Transportation Adventures

I'll likely be flying most everywhere I go, but I'd also like to give myself a break from airports.

My own two feet on a pilgrimage (high on my list is the Camino de Santiago)

One of only a few civilians on a cargo ship

Trains (like these + the Darjeeling Himalayan Railway)

Sailboat (possibly as crew)

River cruises

Trans-Atlantic cruise

Lodging Adventures

I love my Hilton points as much as the next business traveler, but it gets a bit sterile after a while.

Airbnb

House sit

Monasteries

Live/Work farms

A glass igloo under the Northern Lights in Finland

Hostels

Conservacion Patagonica

Bucket List Adventures

Random stuff I dream of doing that feels too big and too exciting to be listed as a mere location. These feel more like once-in-a-lifetime experiences. 

Write for The Avid Cruiser as much as possible

As many UNESCO World Heritage sites as I can manage

Snorkel the Great Barrier Reef

Skydive. Somewhere. Anywhere. As long as it's tandem.
At least one night on a private, remote island (I must stop watching The Bachelorette)

Northern Lights

Pyramids of Giza, Egypt

The Great Wall, China
Sleep with an Italian. In Italy. More than once.

Petra, Jordan

Taj Mahal, India

Machu Picchu, Peru

Hot air ballooning in Cappadocia, Turkey

Logistical Considerations

My family traveled around the States a lot when I was young. I was 15 when I went abroad for the first time, with friends, to Russia. I've been exploring the world ever since in one way or another. I know myself as a traveler. I know my patterns. I know what puts me in the flow and makes me feel awesome, and I know what makes me tense and burns me out. 

Balance and alternate city trips with wilderness trips. Go go go then chill chill chill. 

Balance and alternate guided group experiences and getting lost all on my own. 

Balance and alternate luxury and budget experiences, from lodging to transportation to food. 

Balance and alternate solo travel with group travel, be it friends or strangers.

These balances and alternations are very literal, says the introverted Libra. For example: A hostel in the heart of Paris with packed days and colorful nights...then housesitting and grocery shopping in Nowhere, Norway...then a river cruise in China with guided excursions...then an Airbnb in Japan with an invitation to a friend from back home. Like that. 

Also, unplanned windows of time. This makes my palms sweat and I desperately want to color code something to calm myself down, which is exactly why I know I need to do it. For every ellipses you see in the itinerary above, add an undecided length of time filled with random whatever. Maybe it's additional time in the current or the next location. Maybe it's a quick stop somewhere between the two locations. Maybe it's a multiple choice game presented to readers of this site, letting you chose your own adventure with/for me. For real. The goal is space. Time. Allowing. Staying open to the magic of it all. 

Mighty Life List

I'll obviously update this site as I pursue my RTW adventure, but you're also invited to join me on Go Mighty. In fact, I challenge you to create your own Mighty Life List. It will take me a while to fully populate my Mighty Life List, but I kind of like that it's an ongoing process. Check them out! Decide to be one of those people who pull it off.

I'd love to hear from you. Have you tackled a RTW trip? Have you tackled any big dream, really? Let's talk. Let's inspire each other. Let's do this. 

Love and adventure, 

me

You are because you say you are.

I recently wrote about a dream coming true. Traveling to Alaska (bucket list destination) courtesy of Princess Cruises (hello, press credentials) writing and photographing (numero uno dream job of all time) for The Avid Cruiser (a respected mentor and friend). It doesn't get more exciting than this. I've been blogging and traveling and writing and wanderlusting and photographing and dreaming for years. At times I wanted all of that energy to lead to something and at other times I just kept going because it makes me happy. At times I pursued the goal with specific intentions and at other times I ignored it entirely, going about my normal life. This ebb and flow, this evolving dance with what I really want out of my life, has been going on for what feels like forever. Now here I am. Even though it could seem simple, this one assignment, I still believe it's an absolute manifestation. It feels surreal. That's actually what I want to talk about, the surreal nature of it all. This thought has been stewing for a while now: You are because you say you are. Jen Sincero, Wayne Dyer, and I have something to say about the power of owning it.

Owning it. No apologies. No excuses. Taking a proactive role in defining the life you want to live. 

Ralph Grizzle (a.k.a. The Avid Cruiser) recently posted about the three journeys covered on the Live Voyage Report site in May. When I read his words, I couldn't take them in. It felt like an out of body experience. Who is this woman he's talking about, anyway? 

A chance meeting a couple of years ago resulted in our welcoming aboard Gail Jessen. Gail is a Salt Lake City based writer who will be reporting for us from Star Princess as she and the ship make their way from San Francisco to Skagway — and back. Gail wrote an engaging piece that will tell you who she is and how she became a travel writer. You will find her post here. For inspiration alone, it is recommended reading.

A Salt Lake City based writer? How she...became a travel writer? Inspiring? I stared at the screen. Agape. Holy shit, you guys. I'm a writer based in Salt Lake City. That's me he's talking about. I'm a writer. I write. I'm writing. I'm in Salt Lake City and I write, like writers do. I'm a travel writer. I write about travel. Out in the world, while traveling, I write. I'm a writer of travel stories based in Salt Lake City. My reaction was a bit like...Bob's.

I'd say printing a box of oh-so-official business cards - to hand out on the ship and to family/friends - is owning it.

One particular point from Sincero's book, You Are a Badass, comes to mind a lot lately. I'm paraphrasing, but she basically says: You want to be a photographer...but you don't take pictures. What sense does that make? Conversely, you take a lot of photos and it's a significant passion for you, but you say you're not a photographer? Why the hell not? What's a photographer then? Someone who takes pictures. So go do that. Say you're a photographer. Aren't you? Then go do it some more. You are whatever you say you are simply because you said it...then did something about it. She writes:

Set your intention, work steadily in the direction you want to go, do all that you know how to do, believe it’s here and available to you, be diligent about how you speak, think and behave, have faith in yourself and The Universe, and then...drum roll please, this is the super important part...breathe, let it go, fuggetaboutit, give it some damn room to come in. 

While I read Sincero over a year ago, I've recently been making my way through Wayne Dyer's newest book, I Can See Clearly Now. I tackle bits and pieces here and there, mostly letting the new paradigms settle in between readings. It's the kind of a book you take your time with and he's that kind of author. What's percolating to the top is his discussion of "I AM..." The phrase "I am" is one of the most profound, transformative phrases we can possibly utter. We literally create our reality with that phrase. Think about it. It's so simple, but it's such a game changer. We can unfairly turn "I'm having a rough day and lost my temper for a moment" into "I am an angry person." We can also then take a proactive role in defining the life we want to live by turning "I like to write and maintain a blog" into "I am a travel writer."

I AM. Sit with it for a minute. Think of all the ways you're currently shaping your reality with I AM statements (conscious or out loud or not). Think of all the ways you could shift your future reality by intentionally focusing on the power of "I AM."

I'll kick it off: I am a travel writer based in Salt Lake City.

Love,
me

This post is dedicated to Jo and Elizabeth, two amazing women who inspire me...and who I've never actually met. Through the magic that is Instagram and, coincidentally, an online photography course, we found each other. Without saying much - a double-tap photo like here, a Facebook comment there - we've connected and we just get it. This is for them. 

Sailing Alaska + Writing for The Avid Cruiser

I met The Avid Cruiser as one should expect to meet him, on a ship in an exotic locale. My friend Kris and I were sailing with Viking River Cruises up the blue Danube, hopping from one fabled Christmas market to the next. Ralph Grizzle and I ended up in the ship's empty dining room at the same time, and proceeded to have a conversation that I've since realized was one of the most powerful catalysts I've ever experienced. Our topics ranged from the casual (work, climate, favorite travel destinations, lost luggage), to the provocative (our love of socialism, creativity, vagabond souls, life in Denmark, and insatiable wanderlust). Near the end of our lunch, I rudely pulled out my iPhone to instagram a beautiful dessert. Naturally. Once the conversation turned to mobile photography, and we connected to each other's Instagram feeds, the flame was officially lit.

Exploring Regensburg, Germany with Kris (left) in 2012

You see, I'd been timidly flirting with the idea that my life (and identity, if I'm honest) no longer needed to be defined by a stressful 9-5 j.o.b. I'd been toying with the notion that creativity was no longer a luxury, but a state of being I needed to achieve and maintain daily. Once I got home I started hosting a monthly brunch + book group dedicated entirely to exploring the concept of happiness. I was starting to say it out loud...  I'd finally admitted to myself the exciting, terrifying, seemingly impossible truth: I'm at my best when I'm in motion. I'm in a state of centered bliss when I'm untethered. I need to travel. It's not an option or a nice thing to do a couple times a year if I can save my pennies and vacation days. It's a profound ache that hash tagging "wanderlust" on a few Facebook photos doesn't begin to satiate.

Enter one of the most successful digital nomads I've ever met. Ralph had no idea he was changing my life.

He questioned me a number of times throughout the trip: "Why don't you do this professionally?" And "These photos are legitimately good. This is something you could pursue." And "Tell me where you work again? Why?" And eventually "I'm happy to help you make contact with..."

Almost 18 months and hundreds of gmails later, I'm sailing to Alaska courtesy of Princess Cruises, writing and photographing my adventures for Ralph's Avid Cruiser Live Voyage Report website. I don't need to wax poetic about dreams coming true - it feels indulgent - but do let me say this once: This opportunity is, in the most literal sense, a dream coming true. I am profoundly grateful.

So here we go! Alaska. America's last great frontier. On 05/22/2014 I set out from San Francisco and you'll be able to follow the adventure every night as I post on the Live Voyage Report website (bookmark it now). You can also follow the adventures in real time on my Instagram and Twitter feeds. In the meantime, drool with me over this Alaska Pinterest board curated by Princess Cruises. I mean, seriously.

Love,
me

Banner created by Aaron Saunders, creator of From the Deck Chair, and co-creator of + contributor to Avid Cruiser's LVR.

A New Year. The Desire Map. Feelings That Aren't Feeling-y Enough.

Since my last post I spent a week in New Orleans, a week in Southern California, and have now ushered in the new year at home in Salt Lake City. Photos of these trips will be posted shortly, btw. For now, however, I need to talk to you about The Desire Map.

I've posted about The Desire Map on this site before; primarily declaring that I knew it was out there, skating around it because I'm afraid of it, and acknowledging it would kick my emotional ass once I let it. Well, friends, I'm finally tackling it. I read it on all of my plane rides to and fro. I spent the entire day today (01 January 2014!) making my way through the workbook and trying to settle on my Core Desired Feelings. I also committed to my power word for 2014.

My power word and my experience with The Desire Map are so cosmically intertwined that I cannot talk about one and not the other. My 2013 power word was ABUNDANCE. I focused on (re)training my brain out of a scarcity mindset and believing and trusting and knowing there's enough of everything and all of that jazz. Well, The Universe flooded me with abundance and I now need to get out of my own way. I need to let it all flow through me and stop trying to control it, second guess it, one up it, over analyze it, and generally screw it up. Entre my 2014 power word: OPEN. My 2014 power phrase, more accurately: OPEN TO MAGIC.

I'm an academic through and through. Over half my life has been spent in school, college, a graduate program, professional certification courses, and my entire professional career has been built within the academy as well. The concept of magic, of faith, of things that cannot be explained, of something happening that I myself did not create and control...it's all a bit foreign. At least, it feels more foreign to me now that it ever has before. I think I used to be open. I think I used to be open to magic even. I used to be quite a romantic, really. You'd never know it if you met me for the first time today. Even though, at my core, I'm divinely feminine and unnervingly intuitive, the woman you'd meet on the street today is rational and precise and hyper logical and in control and pulled together and cynical and on top of it and you get the idea. I need to soften it up a bit. I need to be open again, open to letting all the energy and abundance flow in and out and around me, fluid and flexible. I need to let myself lean in to a bit of magic.

Enter my desire mapping process. I read the entire book. I powered through over a hundred workbook pages. I color coded. I dog eared. I post-it tabbed. I rocked it. I'm doing this. I'm making a list of Core Desired Feelings. I'm researching the etymology and combing through the thesaurus. I'm coding my qualitative research and identifying patterns. I'm failing already. I end up with a final list of words that make perfect sense and accurately identify my Core Desired Feelings, but they have no razzle dazzle, no sex, no magic, no...emotion. Hashtag irony. My entire mantra for the year is to be OPEN TO MAGIC and I've created the perfect list of core desired feelings...that don't feel like anything. They are not vulnerable. They are not open. They are not magical. Well, fuck.

I leave it for a while. I watch a few episodes of The Daily Show on hulu while I cook and laugh it off. When I return to the list I tell myself, "You're not being honest. Just say it. 'In Communion' is the perfect phrase for what you want to feel at your core, but to you the words feel patriarchal and Catholicish. So what if it's perfect...if it doesn't feel perfect to you?! Just say it. Be as simple as possible." I re-do the list three more times.

As of now, my Core Desired Feelings, including my 2014 power phrase:

OPEN TO MAGIC

ABUNDANT

CREATIVE

STRONG

FREE

SPIRITUALLY CENTERED

I waffled between "abundance" and "abundant" for a good 45 minutes. I'm still waffling. I had "healthy" in the list, but know that "strong" will get my ass to the gym with greater gusto. I discussed my reaction to the phrase I lovehate: "in communion." I had four iterations of my list that included "secure/free" as one word. That whole "secure/free" thing is a barrel of monkeys I will unpack throughout this whole year, but for now, I'm committed to the core core core, which is free.

In all honesty, I still don't think I'm there yet. I still don't feel these words are the very core of me. I still sense they are masking a bit of...something. I do know, however, that done is better than perfect. I also know that I will work through a month with these words and revisit them. I also also know that as I unravel more and more and more layers of my 2014 power phrase, I will inevitably unravel more and more and more layers of my desired feelings. I'll reach the core. I'm not there yet, but I will be.

I will be.

Love and desire,
me

Completing My Craft Lake City Collaboration (sort of)

As my time working with Craft Lake City comes to a close, I've spent some time sprucing up the collaboration landing page. Originally, I only posted the introductory paragraph of the artist profiles and I included only a few photos from the workshop recaps. I did this to help drive traffic to the Craft Lake website. Now that the big push is over, I want everything to be properly posted and archived on my own site.

On the revamped page you can access an artist's profile or a workshop by selecting their cover photo. The full article and the full slideshow are now included on my site. Take a minute to look around, will you?

It's been a creative four months and I've loved the experience. Long-time readers will remember that I started 2013 with the power word ABUNDANCE. That intention took many forms over these past 12 months, one of which being CREATIVITY. I needed it back in my life and I expressed that need repeatedly. Well kids, my experience of this Universe is that you tend to get what you ask for. Eventually. Be specific and be ready. Intentions, focus, hard work...and saying yes. Keep saying yes.

I'll always look back on my time with Craft Lake as a period of rich creative renewal. I was able to flex my atrophied creative writing muscles, hone my rusty journalism skills, and dust off my camera. I got back in a groove and I needed that. I met amazing artists, many of whom live mere blocks from me, and am now thoroughly convinced that Salt Lake City is one of the craftiest cities ever. I gained the experience of working with a professional publishing team (Craft Lake was started and is still managed by the masterminds behind SLUG Magazine). I also now understand what freelancing feels like on top of my 40-60 hours-a-week j.o.b. (whew). On top of it all, I think I created a strong portfolio of work, if I do say so myself. And I do say so. I totally just said it. Bam.

Check out the new landing page. Read the profiles. Support the artists. Buy locally and buy handcrafted. Enjoy the workshop slideshows and how-to recaps. Get your hands dirty and get crafty with your friends. Read SLUG.

I'll retain the title of Contributing Blogger and they'll continue to contact me about future assignments. Stay tuned. Who knows...there may be another profile or two coming your way.

Love and abundant creativity,
me

Incubating Dreams

While I love The Cult of Done Manifesto for what it can do to help me manage counterproductive perfectionism, the truth is that some projects take longer than a week to knock out (see Manifesto point no.5). The realistic flip side is that some goals require a long game. Of course we need to make progress on interim goals, and consider those Done a'la manifesto, but when we're talking about massive, life-changing, feel-silly-even-saying-it-outloud dreams, I think we need a different way to approach it.

A recent post by life coach Kate Swoboda provides a helpful framework for thinking about the incubation of dreams. She contends that "The way we go after the dream is just as important as the fulfillment of the dream itself." She challenges us: "How is your dream incubating? As you’re working, what’s your dream marinating in? What’s the energy that it’s gestating and developing in?" She goes on with examples of productive and unproductive incubation energy, if you will.

I don’t know why I’d bother. No one will show up, anyway.
becomes...
This is hard, but it’ll be worth it.

I’m putting all of this work in, so it had better work out for me!
becomes...
I live a good life now, and I know I’ll live a good life, later–no matter what the outcome.

I’m so afraid. I’m so afraid. I’m so afraid. I’m so afraid.
becomes...
I’m afraid, but I’m willing to trust. I’m afraid, but I’m willing to trust. I’m afraid, but I’m willing to trust.

It's so simple, right? She's not presenting earth-shattering revelations, she presenting gentle reminders of what we know in our soul and forget in the daily grind. How many times have I sat down to write a blog post and said, "I don't know why I bother. No one will read this anyway." Instead of clicking over to netflix and spending time feeling deflated, the mantra should be, "This is hard, but it'll be worth it."

It's a call to action for myself as much as it is for anyone reading this. We need to be conscious of the white noise, the subconscious energy, and the space in which we're incubating our dreams. And doesn't it all end up boiling down to abundance? My 2013 power word has been a doozy, let me tell you. I've come to realize, without fail, most everything in life breaks down to fear/scarcity or love/abundance. The incubation of our dreams, if I may put words in Kate's mouth, must happen in an abundant space. As she said, "The conditions under which our dreams are created do affect the outcomes. Stop, breathe, get present to what you’re creating at all points along the way." {tweet it}

Love and love and more love,
me

The Cult of Done: A Manifesto

created by illustrator James Provost (click for links to purchase the print).

A few years back, Kio Stark and Bre Pettis, CEO of MakerBot and leader in the 3D printing industry, created The Cult of Done Manifesto. If you're not familiar with it, I want to share it with you. If this is old news to you, you're welcome for the reminder. This is good stuff.

As I'm working my way back to a creative mindset and creative set of habits throughout this year, I find myself getting stuck at familiar road blocks. And by "familiar road blocks" I mean to say paralyzing perfectionism. If it can't be a perfect end result right out of the gate, then it's not good enough and I need to stay at the drawing board, as it were. Lame, I know. Not very not present-minded, either. Eckhart would be so disappointed in me. While this pattern is engrained in my DNA, and it's not easy to shut that off, The Cult of Done Manifesto is an excellent slap in the face. Thirteen slaps, actually. Ready? Here we go:

The Cult of Done Manifesto

1. There are three states of being: Not knowing, action, and completion. {tweet it}
2. Accept that everything is a draft. It helps to get it done. {tweet it}
3. There is no editing stage.
4. Pretending you know what you're doing is almost the same as knowing what you are doing, so just accept that you know what you're doing even if you don't and do it.
5. Banish procrastination. If you wait more than a week to get an idea done, abandon it.
6. The point of being done is not to finish but to get other things done. {tweet it}
7. Once you're done you can throw it away.
8. Laugh at perfection. It's boring and keeps you from being done. {tweet it}
9. People without dirty hands are wrong. Doing something makes you right. 
10. Failure counts as done. So do mistakes. {tweet it}
11. Destruction is a variant of done. {tweet it}
12. If you have an idea and publish it on the internet, that counts as a ghost of done.
13. Done is the engine of more. {tweet it}

Whether it's long-range creative pursuits or motivation to empty the dishwasher, this manifesto is so packed with wisdom. 

Love, number eight, and cheers to done, 

me

Examining Creative Patterns + Myths

While I started my 2013 Happiness Project with the power word "abundance," it quickly sprouted a supplemental focus: creativity. I've been working my way back into creative spaces that come naturally for me, but that I had suppressed into a deficit. This focus has led me to take up the hobby of acrylic painting, it brought about an artistic collaboration with a dear friend, it put out enough energy that Craft Lake City called me in to concoct a guest blogger series, it has raised my frequency (as original badass Jen Sincero would say) and ushered in all sorts of goodness. However, over the last couple months, the concept of creativity has become negatively loaded. I think it built to a head after the Robert Fritz CREATING workshop. Parenthetical: No, the irony is not lost on me.

I've come to admit that when I overlay this renewed creative spirit onto my Type A Over-achiever personality, the pure joy of surrendering to generative energy gets lost a bit. Suddenly, my painting has to lead to something and will I sell at farmer's markets and how do I monetize the hobby and when will I possibly find time to paint every day when the light is right and I'm stuck in the office and how will I ever license my work to appear on iPhone cases and lumbar pillows and ... Hashtag scarcity mindset. I know. It's obvious. I'm even hyper aware of it the exact moment my brain spins out. But it still spins out.

In reflecting on how to get a handle on this, I realized that when I uncovered my second power word, I told myself that reconnecting with creativity meant I was now A Creative All The Time Like That Is My New Reality.

It doesn't work that way. As it turns out.

Reading a recent post by Danielle LaPorte was like getting smacked across the face with a You're Welcome reality check. "As artists," she writes, "we have patterns of creating. A way we typically make things happen. A style in which we pull ideas down from the ethers and put them into form." Wait. What? You mean my creativity can have it's own pattern? That means the Type A Over-acheiver pattern that I'm dragging home with me from a fierce day at the office does not have to be the same pattern that paints pretty pictures? Huh.

Seems obvious, right? Yeah, sure, it does now.

Danielle identifies a few creative patterns:

Pounds at possibilities like a stick on a piñata until it rains down candies of goodness.

Plods like an ox and patiently awaits the harvest.

Falls in love again and again with ideas and people and keeps falling in love every time.

Dances with harmony, always looking for the most beautiful solution and energetic alignment.

Moves mountains no matter what listening to heavy metal or Madam Butterfly cranked in the background.

I think I'm somewhere between falling in love and dancing with harmony. As a hippie dippie Libra who prattles on constantly about balance and the vibration of things, I think love and alignment are pretty accurate. I think there's more nuance to that - I can see myself in other patterns, and can even imagine patterns that she didn't write about - but it's a good place to start the investigation. In other words, I may move mountains to pound away at pinatas all day at work, but I think the core of my soul is far more gentle and carries a different energy entirely.

She goes on to say, "When you identify your Creativity Pattern you’ve got a very powerful opportunity: Change the way you get stuff done because it’s killing you, or keep mastering your tao of doing because it’s getting you beautiful results across the board." The paradox is that the mountain mover way I get stuff done at work and the way I achieved a MA, homeownership, national consulting career, my third passport, and being the boss lady all before age 30...works. But it works in a very one-dimensional way. When Danielle talks about getting results, the pinata pounding certainly gets results; however, it is simultaneously killing me. Figuratively, when we talk about my creative soul, and literally, when we talk about ignoring health concerns because I can't make a pit stop on the fast track to where the hell ever. My tao is somewhere in the love and alignment realm. That means, in practical terms, that I can't burn out at work all day and come home and expect my energy to align with an hour of painting simply because that's what Siri tells me is up next on the calendar. Which raises more systemic questions about my priorities and career, but that's another post entirely.

After Danielle's post cracked me wide open, the next resource came flooding in and showed me how to actually move forward with these ideas. I came across "Everything You Thought You Knew About Creativity Is Wrong" -- bingo. David Goldstein and Otto Kroeger published a book connecting the Myers-Briggs Type Indicators to creative patterns. Love it. They also identified five big myths about creativity:

Myth No.1:
Stepping outside your comfort zone is the best way to elicit creativity. {tweet}

Myth No.2: 
Brainstorming sessions are the best way to come up with brilliant ideas. {tweet}

Myth No.3:
Being creative means being spontaneous. {tweet}

Myth No.4: 
Creative people must invent something new. (tweet} 

Myth No.5:
Creativity means having a finished product. {tweet} 

In other words, Self, even though you've made incredible strides this year, you're hitting a threshold now because you've essentially been pounding away with the mis-guided belief that those five statements, to the letter, were how you needed to handle creativity. Myths. A revelation. Done.

Now it's time to create, or rather discover, my own creative pattern. It's also time to clickety click and read the kindle version of Goldstein & Kroeger's book. No more guilt. No more "I should be painting right now" and no more "I have to write that post tonight" -- find the pattern that will sustain me over the long haul.

Love and alignment,
me

If I'm honest about my dreams...

On the heels of my previous posts about studying and implementing the Structural Dynamics model of Robert Fritz, I feel compelled to take a public step toward owning my desired reality, to use Fritz's term. I've been mulling over these dreams to some degree or another for years now. In fact, people who have read this blog for any length of time will already know where I'm going with this. I've eeked out bits and pieces of these dreams along the way. However, not until this moment in time have they been so clear. 

Because of my 2013 Happiness Project, since January I've been able to crystalize previously vague-ish longings. The pubic aspect of sharing on this site, versus another offline brunch convo with my besties, serves a number of important outcomes: 1) Vulnerability isn't my strong suit (says the girl with a mostly-personal blog, I know) and I need to get over myself in that regard; 2) Accountability, perceived or legitimate, to anyone other than my own thoughts; 3) Support, because I know I'm far from alone in the pursuit of bold visions; 4) Culmination of these resources outside of my elaborate Evernote folders and tags. Consider this a meta bookmark of a small fraction of the ah-ha moments I've had recently; and finally, 5) I sincerely believe that all of these resources are "the magic" - in referencing again the work of Robert Fritz:

The resolution of the tension, and the action steps needed to move toward the desired reality, will all define themselves organically simply because you're holding the tension. You have to leave room for magic. Your job is to hold tension, and then say yes.

So here's the deal: I want to live abroad (ahem, Denmark) and enjoy a creative career and travel a lot a lot a lot. I was passionate about my current career for more than a decade. To be fair, I still am passionate about it in many ways; however, I've finally accepted that it can no longer sustain me in the way I want to be sustained and engaged in my life. Between the lines: I can no longer slug out 50-hour weeks and 6 hours of meetings every day that ultimately contribute to mere incremental, non-systemic change and a 1% cost of living raise every 3 years. I need creativity. I need flexibility. I need a career that fills me up and inspires me instead of draining my energy nearly every day. I need to wake up and take photos before checking my email on my own schedule in a coffee shop in Argentina.

Huffington Post's Third Metric project has been reporting on the trend of professionals leaning back from their current careers (as opposed to the now-infamous Lean In strategy a'la Sheryl Sandberg). The premise of the Third Metric conversation: "All the talk of "leaning in" at work ignores one reality: Many people in early stages of their career want flexibility and ownership at their jobs, not just a big job title or paycheck. Is it time to stop chasing promotions, and start enjoying life?" In the video below, Kim Dinan is particularly inspiring to me. I'm already half way through her book and I only bought it last night. I also love the conversation about money near the 15:00 mark. Here's a shorter snippet of the video, only highlighting the quit-your-job-and-travel guests.

Through the internet rabbit hole of clicking and stumbling, I also came across the gorgeous video embedded below. There are so so so many blogs, people, twitter accounts, and examples of bravery and wanderlust online. It's totally overwhelming. When I really think about it, though, even before all of that was reality I remember watching Long Way Round in 2004 and Long Way Down in 2007 and thinking: I need this. My first international trip to Russia in 1996, for that matter, set it off. Why I'm only just now getting serious about it, I don't know. Regardless, my RSS feed is now stuffed with blogs and travelogues of people who have gone before and lit the way, as it were. 

But what does it actually look like to take on this dream and make it happen? What does it really mean and how do I make it work? All the artsy vimeo videos in the world won't actually get me there, so now what? I know Robert Fritz would tell me to stop focusing on The How and instead only hold tension between where I am now and where I want to be, but damn. It's difficult to not at least try and answer The How of it all. I suspect that The Wireless Generation documentary, soon to be making the festival circuit thanks to a successful Kickstarter, is a giant nudge in the right direction.

Okay, Magic, let's go down that road then. I've been saying for quite a while now that if you mashup my key passions and skills - then try to assign them to a career - it basically comes out as some version of a traveler/writer/photographer/designer.  Throw in a BA in English, a MA in Community Leadership, and 11 years as a project/program manager turned higher-ed administrator...and...okay. So. Start there. Even with a wealth of online resources to make it happen smoothly, the idea of freelancing unfortunately scares me to the point of near paralysis (clearly something I need to get over, and quickly). Paralysis in tow, I still can't shake this desire out of my system: Vagabonding: An Uncommon Guide to the Art of Long-Term World Travel (Rolf Potts). The idea of digital nomading feels so right to me. The Life Almost Fearless blog shared a post outlining the history of this career niche. That made it feel almost doable. I've read the post like 20 times at this point. Truth be told, I really just want Andrew Evans' job. I mean, come on. National Geographic's Digital Nomad? *sigh* The inspiration is endless. 

A drop in the bucket in my sea of my RSS feeds.

Now...what can I do about all this? I suck at being idle, and I think I might have been bored once for five minutes in 1989, so this has been percolating long enough. This guy seems helpful and I'd give him my money in exchange for his nuggets of wisdom. These two make it work, and the price is right, so I'll set aside the fact that they make me feel like a grandmother and probably try their course. But even those leaps feel premature. I think I found my next step in the Matador Network, specifically Matador U. I plan to pinch my pennies and take both the travel writing and the travel photography courses. Also, similar to the crowdsourced travel guides of Matador, I've been obsessed with AFAR for a while now. I have an application in hand to become the first (and for now, only) Local Expert for Salt Lake City. There's a meta intersection with all of this and I'm just trying to say yes, yes, yes to it all. While it has felt like an organic progression to this point, I also know I need to stop thinking and researching...and just do.

Love and magic and hard work, 
me

Creating: Implementing the work of Robert Fritz (part two)

My first post about exploring the work of Robert Fritz left off at the point of explaining his method for actually changing our life's structures and creating what we want for ourselves. The critical element of Structural Dynamics is Structural Tension, which is the method for creating. We have to be willing to formulate and hold a purposeful, carefully-calibrated, goal-powered tension. Tension, per the laws of nature, seeks resolution. Picture an archer's bow and arrow, or the pull of a rubber band in two opposing directions. Eventually, nature resolves tension.

The tension we're creating is between our desired reality and our current reality. In order to establish authentic tension, you have to 1) Be crystal clear about your desired reality and your goals; and 2) Be brutally honest about your current reality. You're establishing the end points of the rubber band, in essence, then you're going to stretch it and hold it. You may be holding this tension for a day and then it resolves, or you may be holding this tension for years...it all depends on what you're trying to create. The key is this: Your focus must be on the degree of your desire, not the degree of inevitable difficulty. You have to want it regardless of that difficulty and you have to commit to work toward it in spite of that. It's no longer about being comfortable, it's about creating what you want in your life. 

To describe your desired reality is to picture the results of achieving the goal, and picture them vividly, in present tense, the good and the bad aspects of the achievement. Quantify it and make it as specific as possible, but do not describe a process. Describe only a result. "I go to the gym five times a week" is a process. "I weigh (insert ideal) pounds" is a result. That result is the vision and desired reality. Also, and this was key for me to understand as a hyper-rational problem solver, don't solve problems in the statement of your desired reality. Do not frame your goal statement as a deficit you want to solve. Frame it positively as something new you love enough to bring into being. You're not fixing something. You're creating something new. 

To describe your current reality is to objectively name every current fact that is relevant to the desired reality. In relation to achieving the desired reality from your starting point, ask yourself: What do I know? What do I not know? Keep in mind that your current capacity is not your future capacity. You can grow into your goals. Don't get lost in the weeds of HOW to get to your goal, just describe your current reality as it objectively is in this moment. 

That whole business of not focusing on The How? That's terrifying to me. As an administrator who came through the ranks of project and program management, my professional life (and identity) is wrapped up all day every day in The How of problem solving and advancing toward fulfilling my organization's mission. This is different. Let that go. The resolution of the tension, and the action steps needed to move toward the desired reality, will all define themselves organically simply because you're holding the tension. The space in between the two ends of the rubber band will be flooded with The How if you can stay focused on the tension. I know we're wandering out into a flowered field of hippie dippie energy, but stick with me. You have to leave room for magic. Your job is to hold tension, and then say yes. 

To make all of this real for myself I tried to think of a time in my life that I used this tool of structural tension, albeit not yet knowing Fritz's language and models. I wanted to walk myself through the process and see what it actually looks like in the real world. I didn't have to think back very far, as it turns out. When I started 2013 I selected a power word (abundance) and launched The Happiness Project. Outside of hosting a monthly book group and cooking brunch with friends, the project has meant boiling down exactly what it is I need in and from my life in order to feel fully engaged and happy. Creativity has emerged as the dominant theme and, without really knowing it, I set up structural tension between my then-creative deficit and my desired state. Resources, websites, ideas, activities, collaborations, opportunities, communities, The How...it has all flooded into my life and started to resolve the tension and close the gap. And by "flooded" I mean to say it's almost overwhelming at times. I just hang on and keep saying yes. 

In fact, the desired reality has even upped its game since I first started this crazy year. "Creativity" was all I could eek out as I rounded the corner into spring (yes, spring, because I couldn't even name it when I kicked off the year...it defined itself); but now, what I actually mean by "creativity" has further defined and refined itself. I'm working on creating new tensions to move me toward new desired realities. That, folks, is an Advancing Structure of success. That is also what I plan to write about in my next post. It's not really a part three to all of this Robert Fritz stuff, but it is something that has been percolating in light of all his talk of "What do you want to create in your life?" 

Stay tuned. 

Love and beautiful tension, 

me

Creating: Studying the work of Robert Fritz

Along with four friends, I recently completed a three-workshop course on the work of Robert Fritz, namely his theory of Structural Dynamics. In summary, when it comes to creating what you want in your life, motivation is virtually irrelevant. Fritz believes that structures define behavior. Think of structure as a river bed that carries the flow and energy of water. If you want the flow and energy of your life to move in a certain direction or behave in a certain way, you need to structurally modify the river bed. Get all Army Corps of Engineers on it. Dig it up. Move it. Rebuild it. Don't give the water the option to flow in any other direction but that of fulfilling your dreams.

Seems simple, right? Seems logical and obvious? Sure. Of course it is. But try doing it. Try unpacking every single aspect of your life that is not as overwhelmingly awesome as you want it to be and then restructure every single aspect of your life around the eventual fulfillment of your overwhelmingly awesome future reality. Sort of intense.

Yet the reason his theory of Structural Dynamics initially seems simple to us is because it strikes the cord of universal truth. In our core, we know he's right. Structures absolutely matter. We're responsible for the structures we allow into and create for our life. His leading question is: Does your life structure work to your advantage, or does it somehow work against your best efforts?

Try it. Ask yourself: Does the goal matter enough to you to structure your entire life around it? {tweet}

As one examines structures to determine whether or not they're built to achieve at the ideal reality, Fritz inserts an additional consideration, that of advancing or oscillating patterns. Also structural in nature, these two patterns will make or break our efforts to create the life we want. The advancing structure is one in which "the success you have achieved becomes the platform for future success. You can build momentum over time, and the sum total of your life experiences leads you forward." Whereas, in an oscillating structure "the success you have created is neutralized. Each step forward is followed by a step backward. Within this structure, success cannot succeed long term." Furthermore, once you're tuned in to all this jazz, you can even predict the point of reversal in an oscillating structure. In reference to the Kate Swoboda video I posted a couple days ago, she identifies a list of excuses that not only tie to fear, but that are also essentially pivot points of oscillating structures.

Fritz argues passionately about the need to do the work of Structural Dynamics in our lives. He pleads with us to align the river beds of our life to flow into our overwhelmingly awesome goals...because too many people bury their dreams in order to become realistic. In his words:

You cannot dedicate your life's energy to a compromise. {tweet}

So what now? We need to master the mechanics of creating the life we want, and that involves creating purposeful tension. More about that in part two.

Love and brave questions,
me

Owning the Fear.

I've been reflecting a lot lately (off-line, mostly) about fallow versus fertile creativity and also about fear. I think my brain is gearing up for a post, but for now, watch this video from Kate Swoboda of Your Courageous Life. It's resonating.

I recently participated in a workshop series with four of my girlfriends. I mentioned it only briefly on this site, but those thoughts have also been brewing into a post that will come soon. There's something to be said about oscillating patterns of behavior that keep you from advancing success upon success upon success...and what Kate is discussing in the video below is a close cousin to that idea. I like that she calls out our usual list of excuses as nothing but fear. I've been working a lot this year on understanding that everything - absolutely everything - basically breaks down into love or fear, abundance or scarcity. Naming scarcity and fear helps set us on a different path to getting past our own bullshit.

Anyway, all of that is percolating. More soon. For now, enjoy Kate!

Love and more love, 

me

Trust. Creativity. Antique maps and moolah. #mondaymeditation

We swapped! Alexander has my art and I have his art and now we're arting up each other's art. You can see what I finally mailed to him and watch his reaction to our swap in this video he made. If you're wondering what I'm even talking about right now, here's a quick recap.

Alexander and I have had interesting conversations about fear, abundance, trust, creativity, art, expression, and everything that's become wrapped up in this unique experience. I mean, it all sounds really simple, right? Slap some paint on a canvas, ship it to your friend, he'll throw some more paint on it, we blog, we all move on. Right? Not really. Not when you decide to dive into the lessons that an experience like this can teach. I've worked my way through eight months of 2013 with an intentional focus on creativity and maintaining a mindset of abundance. Painting (for the first time ever) was the way I chose to retrain my brain to live in an abundant reality. All of that work is culminating in such a fascinating way in this collaboration. In the convos below, Alexander is white/left and I'm blue/right:

OM indeed. So, what am I doing with his pieces? He sent two sketches, one lion and one woman. I'm putting words in his mouth, but as I interpret these pieces, the lion is meant to be Alexander (a Leo) and symbolizes his power word: Viral Mindfulness. The woman is meant to be me and symbolizes my power word: Abundance. He could've meant something completely different, but again, this is the magic (and trust) of collaboration.

I feel like the woman has a brave, water energy. I love that we're standing behind her and it feels like all the possibility of this wide world is right in front of her. The ocean is a powerful, sacred space for me and so that's where this woman will live. My first reaction was to paint her environment.

Clearly abundance is about far more than money, but I wanted to infuse this collaboration with all types of abundance, including positive financial energy and abundance. Also, this was a great excuse to  incorporate beautiful currency from all over the world that I found in an antique store in Salt Lake. I've had the map forever and I actually think it was used as wrapping paper on a gift from an ex-boyfriend. Cut. Cut. Rip. Rip. New energy. New stories.

What does all of this have to do with meditation? Well, when I texted Alexander about our swap and our anxiety about messing up each other's stuff, I was saying this to him as much as I was reminding myself:

There is no wrong answer. You cannot possibly mess it up. It will be exactly what it wants to be. You will do everything right because you're doing it. 

This experiment with each other is our relatively low-risk way of practicing, practicing, practicing these concepts of being mindful and abundant, as opposed to going through life disengaged or fearful. There is no wrong answer when it comes to creativity. Someone will look at a Rothko and think it's utter crap and someone will look at it and their whole life will change. If we can learn to take that fearless, abundant, mindful attitude with us everywhere we go, not just into the microcosm of our creative workspaces, we will have created something far greater than a few shared canvases.

Love and cheers to no wrong answers,
gail

Follow my collaboration with Alexander and follow my adventures on Instagram @fourthirtyam.